


Obligatory High School AU

by bibliomaniac



Series: Obligatory School AU [1]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Awkwardness, Bullying, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Multi, Reader-Insert
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-17
Updated: 2016-03-06
Packaged: 2018-05-21 05:57:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 30
Words: 35,988
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6040798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bibliomaniac/pseuds/bibliomaniac
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Being a teenager is hard, especially when you've just moved in the middle of your second-to-last semester of senior year to butt-nowhere.</p><p>Being a teenager is also hard when you're a skeleton and you're failing P.E. and you have a little brother and a science teacher dad who has a lot of Expectations and you have a crush on a super cute, super unattainable girl and, on top of all that, you have to deal with the new kid in town.</p><p>But being a teenager is probably hardest when aforementioned super cute girl gets it into her head that you and Sans are dating.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. First Period

**Author's Note:**

> cw: indirect blood ment, bullying ment
> 
> the asthma story and the dodgeball story are both Real Experiences lol

Being a teenage skeleton is hard.

Like, bone hard.

(Heh.)

Teenagering in general is just pretty sucky, but it’s especially bad when you've got a little brother to take care of, and you're probably failing P.E., and your dad is a science teacher at your school and likes to make an example of you, and you have a crush on the cutest girl in school but she’s already taken, and you're hanging upside down from a hook that’s supposed to hold an anatomy model but those jerks from the football team thought it would be funny to hook you up instead.

Actually, that last one is probably the most pressing issue at the moment. He’s not sure what’s inside his skull—if there’s even a brain for all of the blood that he probably doesn’t have to rush to—but he is starting to feel distinctly woozy. He contemplates passing out for a moment. But no, he has to pick up Papyrus from his middle school, and he has to do homework, and if he skips P.E. again the coach will yell at him and maybe, heaven forbid, tell his dad—

“Um…do you need some help there?”

He opens his eyes to see you (upside down, of course) peering at him inquisitively, head tilted. 

He snorts and says sarcastically, “no, i love being strung up here, it is actually my favorite thing to do.”

You pause, eyebrows wrinkling together. He’s always envied other beings their eyebrows. So expressive. “I…can’t tell whether you’re being serious or not,” you finally say.

He rolls his eyes. “yes, i need help.”

“Oh! Okay.” You give him a hesitant smile and then an apologetic, “I’m going to have to touch you to get you down, sorry.” Your touch is gentle, feather-light as you grip him and lift him off the hook, set him down right-side-up with a pat on the shoulder. “There you go!” 

“uh, thanks. i’m Sans, by the way. Sans the skeleton.”

“_______. The human.” You flash another smile, then falter. “I’m…actually quite lost. That’s why I came in here, I was hoping there would be someone—“

A newbie this late in the semester? Interesting. As much as Sans loves doing absolutely nothing, he also owes you a favor, and you seem nice enough. “and someone there was. what’s your next class? i can help you out.”

“It’s P.E. with…” You frown. “Mr. Staehl? Does that sound right?”

“actually, that’s the class i have next too. nice. i’ll walk you there.”

You heave a sigh of relief. “Thank you so much! I was getting really worried.”

“c’mon. lunch period is nearly over.” He checks the clock on the wall and grimaces. “in fact, we’ll probably be late.”

Your eyes widen and you wail, “Oh, no! Not on my first day! Come on, point where we have to go.”

“uh—that way, but—it’s all the way at the other end of the campus, there’s no way—“

And then you take off, dragging him by his sleeve. He can barely keep up. Every once in a while you’ll stop and he’ll point, and then you start up again.

You reach the gym just as the bell rings, and you collapse on the floor, breathing heavily. Everybody is looking at you. It’s intensely awkward. 

He takes over for the both of you. “sorry, new student. i was showing them around and we lost track of time.”

“So you’re ______?”

From your slumped over position on the dirty floor, you raise a weak thumbs up in affirmation.

“What is wrong with you? You shouldn’t be breathing like that after running unless you smoke a pack a day,” Mr. Staehl says, frowning.

You hold up your index finger, take a few more gasping breaths, then eke out, “Asthma.”

He has the decency to look ashamed. “Oh. Or that.” He runs his hands over his bald head—a habit left over from when he still had hair, albeit very little—and sighs. “Well, you just collect yourself then, and then we can get started.” He turns around and announces to the entire class, “We’re doing dodgeball.” Various cheers and groans arise from around the room.

Sans is still looking at you, so he notices when you tense up. It’s only a minute change, but he’s got good eyes.

He kneels down and whispers “hey, you okay?”

Your breathing is starting to calm down now, and you look up at him with terrified eyes. “I hate dodgeball.”

“so do i.”

“No, like I really hate it. And I’m bad at it, so bad—“

“it’ll be fine. i have a strategy.”

You roll over and stare at him hopefully. “A strategy?”

“yeah.” He smiles reassuringly at you. “and if all else fails we can always get the heck out of dodge.”

You make a face. “You didn’t just make that pun.”

“oh, but i did.” He extends a hand to you, and you take it begrudgingly to get up from off the floor. “now let’s go play some dodgeball.”

He saunters over to Undyne, the star sophomore of the water polo team. P.E. was one of the few mixed-grade classes in the high school, so freshmen and seniors alike were all forced to live through the same hell. They still tended to segregate into groups, but Undyne had been friends with Papyrus before she moved up a grade, so Sans and Undyne knew each other pretty well.

“hey, Undyne.”

“Hey, squirt,” she says cheerfully. “Who’s the new kid?”

“I’m _______,” you introduce yourself, standing up straight. “I just moved to the Mt. Ebott area.”

“Nice.” She takes your hand in a tight handshake, and you try to give back as good as you get. She grins. “I like you already.”

“hey, Undyne, you up to being the guard today?”

She sighs and crosses her arms. “You really should play the game sometime.”

“come on, it’s for the newbie. they’re terrified, just look at their cute lil face.”

“Cute?” you squeak out, your face starting to turn red.

“Fine. For the cute newbie.”

Your mouth opens, but no sound comes out. You just get even more red. Undyne laughs and claps you hard on the shoulder, then strides out in front of both of you.

“So, what’s your strategy?” you ask as the balls start flying.

Sans points at Undyne. “isn’t it obvious?”

“Her?”

“yeah. she stands out in front and keeps balls from hitting us. it’s basically a flawless plan.”

You frown. “Are you sure? Because, let me tell you, projectiles are like…attracted to my face. It’s a problem.”

“we’ll be fine. Undyne is the best there is.”

“Oh.” You squirm uncomfortably, then ask, “So are you two, like…a thing?”

He blanches and whirls to you. “whoa, what? no! where—why—she’s just—“

You hold up your hands. “Sorry, sorry! You just seemed close.”

“yeah, no. first of all, no. second of all, no way. and third of all, she has the most intense crush ever on this junior girl in my science class.”

“NO I DON’T!” yells Undyne from the front.

“she totally does.”

“DO.” She catches a ball forcefully, then throws it back, hitting someone in the stomach. “NOT!”

“fine, okay, you don’t.” He leans over and whispers directly into your ear, “does too.”

You shudder at the closeness. Later, you’ll blame the distraction on why you didn’t notice when San suddenly darts away and says hurriedly, “_______, watch out—“

The dodgeball hits you directly in the nose. 

For the second time that day, you pitch to the floor, clutching your nose, tears beading at the corner of your eyes. Mr. Staehl blows the whistle, and activity stops. “You okay, kid?”

You pull your hands away from your nose and see red, literally. You quickly shake your head and bring your hands back to your nose.

“Crap. Do you know where the nurse’s office is?” You shake your head again. Mr. Staehl sighs and massages his temple. “Sans. I hate to say this, but you were showing them around earlier, so can you bring them there? Their nose looks pretty bad.”

Sans silently and internally fistpumps. Yesssss. He knew making buddy-buddy with you would pay off somehow. He got the rest of P.E. off and he wouldn’t even get in trouble for it!

Outwardly, he just nods solemnly and helps you up again. He does feel sort of bad when he sees the tears streaming down your face. It obviously hurts.

But still.

He walks you slowly over to the nurse’s office, which is again at the opposite end of campus relative to the gym. You look miserable. The nurse, a bear monster with delicate paws, takes one look at you and ushers you into a back room with a sink and a small cot to lay down on. She does her nurse thing while Sans looks on with interest. Humans are so…messy. It’s fascinating. 

“Well, it’s not broken,” the nurse reports to you. “Just a bloody nose. Looks a lot worse than it is.”

You nod from your position on the cot. Sans, sitting on a nearby chair, looks at the clock. "will they be ready to leave in like…five minutes?”

“You got somewhere better to be?” asks the nurse sharply.

“just another class. i can stay, though.”

You wave him away. “No, it’s fine. You should get to your class.”

He hesitates. He really can’t miss Science, either, since his dad is teaching it. He wonders, not for the first time, why the school didn’t label that a conflict of interest or…something. But Mount Ebott High School is pretty small, and they don’t really have an abundance of teachers to throw around. His dad is the only higher-level science teacher they have. It was inevitable, really.

“well, let me at least tell you where your next class is, so you can go if you’re feeling better.”

You give him a lopsided smile. “Thanks, that’s helpful. It’s, uh…science with a Dr. Gaster?”

“seriously?”

You shrink back slightly. “Yes…?”

“no, it’s just that’s my next class too.” He gives a short laugh. “weird coincidence. anyway, that’s in the room you, uh…found me in.”

“Oh, okay! Thanks.”

“no problem.” He shifts his backpack, which is, as always, very light—he doesn’t really bother with bringing textbooks or anything—and makes his way to the door. “feel better, ‘kay?”

“Yeah. Thank you again, for everything.”

“like i said, it’s nothing.” He slips out the door to the hallway without a further word.


	2. Second Period

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> food cw, bullying ment

You don’t end up coming to class that day, and the day after that Sans has different classes—Language Arts, History, and Magic Practice (which was a monsters-only class that his dad insisted on him taking)—so he doesn’t see you. In all honesty, he doesn’t really think about you much either. You had just met, after all.

Plus, he has other things to think about.

Like Toriel.

Toriel is a goat-type monster in his Magic Practice class, and she is beautiful, and she makes puns, and she’s caring and kind and—well. Sans flushes a light blue as he surreptitiously stares at her. Basically, she is perfect. 

Sans has had a huge crush on her since, like, forever. (Okay, maybe that’s an exaggeration. Junior year, which is more or less forever ago, so same thing.) They met through a doorway. More specifically, Sans was hiding out in an empty classroom from the Jock Team when he heard a hesitant knock at the door, and a soft, low voice, “Knock knock?”

“who’s there?” he answered reflexively, then winced. He wasn’t supposed to give away his location! He was the worst at hiding.

There was a pause, then the same voice, which sounded surprised and amused. “Boo.”

“boo who?”

“Stop crying and let me in.”

Embarrassed, he opened the door to see probably the most beautiful monster he’s ever seen. She giggled, and it sounded like music. “May I come in?”

“oh, yeah, of course! i was just…” He searched for an excuse and found none. “here,” he finished weakly.

“I see that. Sorry, I am always early to this class, but the door has never been closed before, so I was surprised.” She grinned. “I definitely wasn’t expecting somebody to respond, much less with a knock-knock joke setup.”

“sorry.”

“No, I liked it!” She extended a hand. “I am Toriel. What is your name?”

And he took her hand, and ever since then he’s been smitten. He started meeting up with her before her class started, and then having lunch together, and then texting each other, and then…a week ago happened.

“Sans!”

He turned around at her voice and gave a genuine grin. “hey, Tori.” And then he noticed that her hand was in someone else’s. He looked up and saw—the quarterback. Reflexively, he shrunk back, his smile dropping immediately.

“Tori?”

“This is Asgore. Have you two met before?” Surprisingly, the answer was no; while Sans was regularly accosted by the football team, their lead man apparently had always stayed out of it.

He shook his head minutely.

Asgore was, and is, a giant of a goat monster, taken to wearing Hawaiian shirts and khakis. Compared to him, Sans felt very small. 

Asgore held out his hand with a huge, jovial smile. He boomed, “Sans! I’ve heard so much about you.”

Sans delicately took his hand and shook it, still staring at Toriel. “i can’t really say the same,” he muttered. Toriel frowned, and he looked away.

Asgore’s smile froze, but to his credit, he kept on going. “I’m so excited to finally meet you. You’ll be seeing a lot more of me, but I think we’re going to get along just fine!”

Sans’ heart dropped. “more of you?”

“Well…” Sans looked up just in time to see Toriel and Asgore share a doting smile. 

And he knew what that meant.

“oh.” He suddenly felt very nauseous. “um, i’m not feeling well, so i’m actually gonna go.”

“Sans,” Toriel began in a chiding voice, but he just slipped away to find a corner somewhere to eat lunch. And, if he’s honest, to sniffle a little bit. 

He’s been avoiding her ever since, and it’s honestly draining. Today at lunch, she found his corner and sat down gently next to him.

“Hey, Sans.”

“hey.” He didn’t look her in the eye.

“I have not seen you in a while. Are you doing all right?”

“aces,” he mumbled. Stop being nice to me, he thought. It just makes it hurt more.

“You’re not sick or anything?”

“nah.”

“Oh, okay. Good. I’m glad.” They sat in silence for a while, just eating their lunches, Sans pointedly looking away from Toriel the entire time.

Finally, she worked up her courage and asked, “Is this…” she hesitated. “Is this because of Asgore?"

“no!” he yelped, obviously overly defensive. “holy crap, not everything is about you, toriel.” He heard her sharp intake of breath.

He immediately cringed. “crap. i’m sorry. i didn’t mean that. it’s just been a rough week. sorry.”

“It’s…it’s okay. I understand. But you know you can talk to me, right?”

“yeah.” No he can’t. Not anymore. Not like before, anyway. 

“All right, well…lunch period is almost over. Do you want to walk to class together?”

“that’s fine. i have to…go to the bathroom.”

“Oh.”

“yeah, sorry.”

They both knew he was lying.

“Well…see you in class, then,” Toriel said, ears drooping. But they always did that, he tried to tell himself. 

“mmhmm,” he murmurs absentmindedly. All he’s thinking is, I need to find a new corner.

So that brings us back to the present, where Sans makes accidental eye contact with Toriel. His eyes widen and he looks away quickly. Crap, this is so awkward. 

He doesn’t know why he can’t just be happy for her. Like, Asgore is actually a pretty nice guy, from what he’s heard. Undyne talks to him sometimes and says that he’s decent. And he’s attractive, and Toriel’s type (apparently), and they go together so much better than the most beautiful girl in school and the resident nerd skeleton.

But still. He can’t stop himself from feeling the ache of her loss, like she’s not there, even though she’s only a few feet away.

He knows, somewhere deep inside, that he won’t be able to keep this up for long. He gravitates towards Toriel like a moon to its planet. He just needs a little bit more time to process, to prepare a fake smile, to pretend like everything is all right. Just a little more time.

Yes, he has a lot to think about, and that’s why he doesn’t notice the next day when he nearly trips over your feet while he’s roaming the school looking for a new place to eat lunch. He makes a terribly undignified squawk and wheels his arms around in search of balance. He finally stands up straight, pumps a fist straight to the sky, and then looks down.

You’re sitting there, looking very amused. “You okay there?”

“yeah, awesome. i also love nearly dying. it is my second favorite thing to do.”

Your eyes narrow, and he worries he might have offended you, until your face brightens and you pat a fist to your open palm. “Sarcasm!”

“yes?”

You look sheepish. “I’m bad at telling. But that means you’re okay, yeah?”

“yeah, i’m okay.” He finally notices that you’re sitting with your lunch on your lap in a corner of the school building, right in front of the Computer Science room. “are you?”

“Huh? Yeah, why?”

“you’re sitting all alone,” he responds with a frown, conveniently forgetting that he’s been doing the same himself, and was planning on doing it again.

“Oh.” You laugh nervously. “Yeah. I don’t really know anybody yet, so…” You shrug. “I don’t mind it all that much, really.”

“well, would you mind a partner?” he asks before his brain catches up with him.

“Oh…no, of course not!” You beam up at him. “I would love the company.”

“okay.” Crap, he was supposed to be wallowing, not doling out charity. “uh, i’ll just…sit down then.”

“You do that.” 

“so, how’s the nose?”

“Feeling a lot better, thanks.” You wrinkle it to show off how much better it’s feeling. “It was never all that bad, just I had a headache after and I texted my mom about it and she got all worried and told me to drive home.”

“gotcha. parents, huh?”

“No kidding,” you say dryly. “But, you know. She cares. More than I can say about some people.”

You both leave that statement alone.

“Wait, are those chisps your only lunch?”

He looks down and shrugs. “well, yeah.”

You scowl. “Unacceptable. You’re having some of mine.”

“uh, i’m really okay—“ You determinedly, despite his protests, hand him half of your sandwich. 

“You touched it, now you have to eat it,” you say primly. “Germs, you know.”

“but you touched it too!”

“Well, yeah, it was my sandwich,” you say matter-of-factly. “But the rights have transferred. I don’t make the food rules, Sans.”

He sputters, but eventually takes a bite. And then another, and another. He hadn’t realized how hungry he was. Well, he did, but he tried to ignore it most of the time.

“hey, thanks.”

“No problem.” You bump against his shoulder in a familiar way and keep eating. “So, how were your classes today…?”

Neither of you see Toriel peering speculatively around the corner, eyes gleaming.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes this chapter is mostly soriel
> 
> no im not sorry
> 
> im excited bc i got the story planned out, at least for a ways! *rubs hands together* we're in for a fun ride folks


	3. Third Period

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: this chapter includes a fight with a parent. also, food ment

The rest of the day goes fine. You suffer through P.E. together—badminton, so at least when things hit you in the face it didn’t hurt—and sit together in Science. Usually he partners with Alphys, but hey, you’re still a newbie, and newbies need help, right? Like a lost little duckling. And, he admits privately, you’re not too bad, either, once you open up a bit.

“I should hope my son would know better than to not pay attention in class,” comes a pointed voice, and Sans groans.

“i am paying attention,” he responds defiantly, while you mouth ‘son?’. “and you’d think a teacher’d know better than to pay special attention to his kid.”

A corner of Dr. Gaster’s mouth curls up. “You would think that, yes.” Then—oh, blessed day—he moves on to check someone else’s work.

“Son?” you hiss at him. “The teacher’s your dad?”

“unfortunately. and shut up, he’s a stickler for non-class related talking.”

You mime zipping your mouth shut, but your eyebrows are reproachful.

After class, you heave a beleaguered sigh. “Jeez, that was rough. Honestly, this has never been my subject.”

“then why are you taking it AP?”

You shrug helplessly. “It was sort of just what you did at my old school. Everybody took this class AP. It was easier there, though. Hey, can I see your notes from last class?”

“yeah, sure.”

You squint at his proffered notebook, and there’s that reproachful look again. “Sans, your handwriting is horrible.”

“beggars can’t be choosers.”

“True enough.” You purse your lips, looking at the material. “I guess I’ll just take a picture of it. I don’t have time to copy it down. Or you don’t, I’m guessing. You have to pick up your little brother after this, right?” You say this as you take out your phone and snap a couple of pictures of the messy scrawl.

“yeah. he gets out later than us, but it’s like a twenty minute walk.”

You wince. “That’s rough, buddy.” 

“yeah. i hate walking. but hey, it could be worse. it could be…jogging.”

You shudder exaggeratedly, then laugh. “You’re right. But, uh…can I ask another favor?”

“depends on the question.”

“Right, well…I was wondering if I could maybe have your number. Just so I can ask if there’s something I absolutely can’t decipher! I swear I won’t give your number to, like, telemarketers or anything.”

“pity. one of the few joys i have in this life is talking to telemarketers.”

You squint, and after a few seconds, you and Sans say in unison, “Sarcasm.”

“but yeah, you can have my number.”

“Thank you! You’re the best,” you say, letting out a breath you didn’t know you had been holding. You tap into the Contacts tab and hold out your phone. “Here, put your number in.”

“no can do.” He wiggles his fingers, which are notably fleshless. 

You look mortified. “Crap, did I just say something completely insensitive? I’m so sorry.”

He chuckles. “you’re fine. i’ll just tell you the number, ok?” He does so, and you put your phone away after texting him a quick, “hey, it’s _______!”. 

“Thank you so much, again! And I’ll see you…” You don’t want to be so presumptuous as to say ‘tomorrow at lunch’, because even if you had fun, who knows if he did? Sans is inscrutable. 

To your delight, though, he adds, “tomorrow. if you want.”

“Yeah! That’d be great. Tomorrow, then.” You wave and walk rigidly out the entrance towards your car. Ohhhhhhh talking to people is so hard. 

But Sans seems nice. Maybe even like he could be a friend. You smile to yourself.

Meanwhile, Sans begins his walk to Papyrus’s school. The terrain is relatively flat, no hills or anything, but he still hates it. 

He’d do a lot more than walk twenty minutes for Pap, though. Papyrus is without a doubt the most important person in his life, bar none. He’s in eighth grade and he’s probably the cutest little skeleton there ever was. (He’s not allowed to say that anymore, though, especially not in front of Papyrus’ FRIENDS, he is not CUTE, he is GREAT, as he’s been told many times by the other skeleton.)

Gaster doesn’t get home from the school until late, so Sans has been taking care of the two of them for as long as he can remember. He prefers it that way, anyway. He and his father aren’t exactly on good terms right now, so when Gaster is home they fight a lot and it makes Papyrus anxious. Papyrus doesn’t deserve that.

His thoughts wander to the situation with Toriel. It’s time to stop giving her the cold shoulder, he realizes with a sigh. She doesn’t deserve it either. It’s not like they had ever been together, or anything. As far as he knows, she’s clueless about his feelings for her. It’s just not fair to her to act like a spurned lover when there was nothing there in the first place. Tomorrow at lunch, he decides.

Oh. But he had more or less promised tomorrow’s lunch to you, hadn’t he. Well…surely you wouldn’t mind if he cancelled? Or rescheduled, maybe that would be better. Yeah. He nods decisively, and pulls out his phone. It’s one of the older kinds without a touch screen, for obvious reasons. He texts you back in the already open conversation “hey, about lunch tomorrow—realized i have something else to do. friday ok?”

Satisfied, he returns to his thoughts.

You get the text and your heart pangs. Oh. Well, okay. You’ve only known each other for, what, two days? Three if you count the day you didn’t see each other? He has other stuff to do. Other friends.

“Friday is fine.”

“cool alrite thx” he texts back, feeling a lot better now that he got all that settled.

You don’t bother texting back.

\------------

“hey, Pap!”

“I TOLD YOU, IT’S NOT PAP! IT IS THE GREAT PAPYRUS!”

This again. Sans rolls his eyes. “yeah, ok, the great Papyrus. what do you want for dinner tonight?”

“SPAGHETTI!”

Sans makes a face. “really? again?”

“I PROMISE I WON’T MESS IT UP THIS TIME! UNDYNE SENT ME HER OWN PERSONAL RECIPE.”

“you sure you don’t just want me to pick up some Grillby’s?”

“SANS, I THOUGHT I MADE IT CLEAR I WAS NOT COMFORTABLE WITH YOU ALWAYS GOING TO THAT DIVE BAR FOR FOOD! IT’S GREASY ANYWAY. NOT LIKE SPAGHETTI, WHICH IS PERFECT.”

“it’s not a dive bar, it’s a perfectly respectable restaurant that happens to serve a lot of alcohol to a lot of drunk people. but okay. spaghetti it is. i think we still have some ingredients left from yesterday.”

“GOOD. I AM GLAD YOU SEE THINGS MY WAY.” Papyrus looks down at Sans proudly, which—he is never going to get used to that. Recently, Pap had shot up at least a few inches taller than Sans, and he’s growing more all the time. 

which reminds him, “are we out of milk?”

“NO…?”

Sans glances at Papyrus, and he relents.

“FINE, OKAY, YES, BUT I HATE MILK!”

“it’s important for growing bones, Pap. you know that.”

“THEN WHY ARE YOU SO SHORT?” he responds snidely.

“because i didn’t listen,” Sans says ominously, and leaves it at that.

When they get home, it’s business as normal. Papyrus goes upstairs to do his homework and Sans lays down in front of the TV for a while until Papyrus needs help. He’s a very conscientious student, but he needs a bit of instruction in math and science. 

Then, Sans watches in horror as Papyrus manages to completely butcher spaghetti, again. He sighs and calls Pizza Hut. Pizza Hut will always be there for him.

They eat the pizza, then Sans gets started on his own homework. He puts in the minimal amount of effort for everything, but it’s managed to get him this far, so…and he’s good at math and science. The minimal amount of effort is more than enough for those subjects.

But not enough for his dad, he reflects. Never enough for him.

Speaking of his dad, it sounds like he’s home. Sans flops back on his bed and stares at the ceiling. He’ll probably be coming up here soon.

“Sans, what happened to the kitchen?”

Right on schedule. “Papyrus.”

“I thought we agreed he needed some…training before he was allowed to cook again.”

“you know i can’t say no to him, Dad.”

“Well, you have to learn how to. You’re the older brother, you’re an adult, it’s your responsibility—“

Sans huffs, already starting to get angry. “sure, you’re one to talk about responsibility. i’m doing the best i can, all right, now can you just get off my back—“

“You don’t even know the meaning of the word ‘responsibility’! Is ‘responsible’ leaving your trash everywhere for me to clean up? Is ‘responsible’ barely passing your classes? Is ‘responsible’ not filling out your college applications?”

“i told you, i’m gonna do it, i just don’t want to do it now!”

“Don’t you want to go to college?”

“what if i don’t?” he roars, and immediately regrets it. Crap. It’s finally out there.

“What?” asks Gaster in a dangerous voice.

“listen, it’s nothing—“

“You don’t want to go to college?”

“it’s—just an idea i’ve been throwing around, it’s no big deal—“

“Of course it’s a big deal! This is your future, Sans! You can’t just laze your way through it like you do everything else!”

“i know, it’s just—“

“It’s just nothing! I don’t want to hear any more of this. Is your homework done?”

“yeah, it’s—“

“Is it done well?”

He curls in on himself. “i dunno,” he mutters. 

“Well, I suggest you find out,” Gaster says frostily.

“yeah.”

“Good. I’m glad we understand each other.” Then, he leaves the room.

Crap, Papyrus. Sans steps across the hallway, knocks lightly on the door. “Pap?”

“GO AWAY.”

“come on, open the door. i’m sorry, okay?”

The door opens slowly, revealing Papyrus huddled up in his favorite blanket, facing away.

“i’m sorry you had to hear that.”

“WHY CAN’T YOU AND DAD JUST GET ALONG?”

“it’s…not quite as simple as that, Pap. we disagree on a lot of things, is all.”

“BUT DO YOU STILL LOVE EACH OTHER?”

“oh, Pap…um, yeah. sure.”

Papyrus comes out of his blanket with hopeful eyes. “REALLY?”

Sans nods haltingly, hating feeling like he’s lying. “but most of all i love you,” he says, with complete honesty, and hugs Papyrus, both of them kneeling on the ground. 

“SANS…FINE, I’LL ALLOW IT, JUST THIS ONCE.” Despite his words, Papyrus snuggles into Sans’ shoulder, and Sans sighs.

He can do this. As long as he has Papyrus, he can do this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lol it accidentally turned angsty? this is only the third chapter, brin, come on
> 
> sorry that this isn't all ______ and sans this chapter, but they lead very separate lives right now
> 
> that may just change next chapter ;)


	4. Fourth Period

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cw: unsanitary (a sneeze)

Your face is cradled by Sans’ bony hands. He’s coming closer, and closer…

And then you sneeze on his face, and he’s drawing back with horror in his eyes, and you’re apologizing, and he’s wiping his head with his hoodie looking disgusted, and—

How did you come to be in this position? Well.

Flashback to early Thursday. Sans feels invigorated, ready to take on the world. He’s making up with Toriel today. Sure, there’s still the whole Asgore thing, but he can take it. It’s worth it to be at her side.

You, on the other hand, are not feeling so perky. You’re not used to the climate in the area, and you think you’re getting a cold. You miss your home, you miss your friends, you miss your classes even. After all, the ones here aren’t turning out so great, are they? On all three counts.

You wish you could just…go back. But you know it’s not possible. Your mom’s new husband—your stepdad, you guess—got a new job and so you had to move to a new house in a new state and go to a new school and make new friends and everything is all so very _new_. You feel like curling up inside your refreshingly old and hole-y blanket and crying.

But, you can’t cry. You have school. You have a lunch to eat alone (again). You have homework to do.

So, instead, you hold yourself high and walk in to the classroom to begin your day. You have your 2-4-6 block today, which consists of AP English Literature, Government/Economics, and AP 2D Studio. The only one you’re really looking forward to is the art class, even though you’re a bit behind in that one as well. You find painting relaxing, and heaven knows you could use some relaxation with all the stress in your life. 

You’re on the variant of the schedule that has one class, then early lunch, then two classes, so after AP Lit you’re ready for your lonely lunch. You had been sort of lying when you said you didn’t mind to Sans. It’s not even the being alone part—it’s all of the people passing by you and giving you pitying looks.

But, there’s no Sans to bail you out this time, so you nuzzle into your corner and start eating. 

When you’re finished with your lunch, you play absentmindedly with your phone. You understand why lunch is an hour, but it’s really too long for you. It’s been forty-five minutes and that means you have another fifteen minutes to fill, and you’re bored. Plus, you can’t stop sneezing…

Suddenly, your phone starts buzzing frantically.

It’s Sans, texting you at rapidfire speed.

“IVE MADE A TERRIBLE MISTAKE”

“sans? whats wrong?”

“IM SO SORRY BUT CAN U PLS COME TO THE PAVILION AND. CAN U JUST GO ALONG WITH WHAT IM SAYING”

When you don’t respond, he sends another text. “PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE ILL EXPLAIN EVERYTHING LATER”

Your eyebrows furrow, but you hitch up your backpack and take off towards the pavilion.

You look around when you get there and finally see a goat monster waving her arm.

Me? you gesture.

She nods quickly.

You walk bemusedly over to the goat monster and her little group, which consists of another, bigger goat monster, a dinosaur-looking monster, and Undyne.

And, as you look down, Sans, who is sweating buckets and looks even paler than normal.

“Sans, what’s up? You sounded—“

He interrupts you with a frozen and very fake grin. “you’re here! thanks, um…honey.”

Your eyebrows climb sky high, and you ask, “Honey?”

“we’re, uh! we’re still working that one out. we’ll get there.”

You send him a look that says, what the frick is happening here?

He ignores your look and sidles over to you, then takes your hand. You look down at your linked hands, then up at Sans. Your eyebrows are in a whole other dimension by now.

“but yeah! this is them. my new datefriend. _______.”

What.

_What._

He sends you a desperate look of his own, and you remember the text. Go along with it, huh? Maybe it’s like…impromptu performance art. 

You paste on a smile. “Yep, that’s me!”

The next moment, you are accosted by everybody else in the group, all talking over each other.

“Wow, so you went for the cute newbie, huh? Nice!” (Undyne.)

“So th-that’s why you didn’t sit with me in Science yesterday!” (The yellow dinosaur monster. Lizard? Whatever.)

“I don’t believe we’ve met, but it’s a pleasure!” (The big goat monster.)

“I knew it!” (The smaller goat monster.)

You look at Sans, who shrinks in on himself. He is still sweating profusely, but you see him peek up at the small goat monster, and you swear you can see hearts in his eyes. Not literal ones, but he looks at her like she hung the stars.

Interesting.

But not interesting enough to rescue you from this situation. You start to feel claustrophobic, with all the people crowding you, so you take a deep breath. “I think I need to, uh, get going to my next class, sorry—“

“But you have ten minutes!”

“Yeah, um…” You look around desperately, gaze landing on Sans.

“jeez, give us some alone time, will ya?” he smoothly interjects.

Catcalls and whoops rise from the assembled group, and you flush hotly. Whatever this is, it’s going too far.

“Okay, but first, a kiss!”

Your eyes grow wide. “What?” WAY too far.

They all start chanting. “Kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss—“

And then your face is cradled by Sans’ bony hands, and he’s coming closer, and—well. You know what happens next.

“Frick, crap, I’m so sorry, I’m getting a cold, I wasn’t expecting you to, uh…”

“it’s snot a problem.”

“But I—“ You pause, process. “Wait, did you just—“

“at least you didn’t get it all over my head, shoulders, sneeze and toes.”

He’s joking to break the tense atmosphere. Or, well, maybe the tenseness is only between you and Sans. The others assembled are in various states of laughter. Undyne is guffawing loudly.

Your shoulders relax, and you give a pained smile. “I am so sorry, really. I have hand sanitizer, if you want some?”

“sure.”

You take out a tissue and quickly wipe him down with hand sanitizer. He starts to shudder when you dab along his cheek. “uhhh—“

“Am I hurting you?”

“no, uh, crap—“

“GET A ROOM,” yells Undyne. You flash her a furious glare, and she just shrugs and grins.

You finish and stand up hurriedly. “Well! That sure was a thing that happened, and now it is definitely time to go. It’s been lovely, folks, truly—“ You start heading away, but Sans catches you by the sleeve of your shirt.

“uh. after school, wanna meet up?”

You frown. 

“just to talk,” he says meaningfully. “shoot the breeze. you know.”

Ah. You nod. “Yeah. Just text me, okay?”

“yeah.”

“Well.” You grimace and hope it looks sort of like a smile. “Bye then.”

And then you make your escape.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and so it truly Begins...


	5. Fifth Period

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you get intense embarrassment from reading cringey situations this chapter may, uh...not be for you lol

Sans cringes all the way through History, trying and failing to mentally prepare himself for Magic Practice. He knows Toriel is going to accost him, he just KNOWS it. And he’s going to have to lie to her face. Again.

But even more than Magic Practice, he’s dreading what comes afterwards. 

You’re going to eat him alive. Frick, you two barely even know each other. What was he thinking?! Well, he knows what he was thinking, he was thinking that Toriel is super pretty and his feelings are still super hurt and maybe, maybe if he says yes, he’s dating the cute newbie, she’ll get jealous and realize she’s meant to be with him, and they’ll live happily ever after, and have at least three kids, and…yeah, before he knows it he’s saying ‘sure’. 

He wishes he could say he wasn’t expecting Toriel to start gushing and insist on meeting you officially, but honestly, that’s so Toriel it hurts. Of course she isn’t jealous, of course she’s happy for him, because she’s actually a good friend and a good person. Not like Sans.

This is such a mess. 

He walks into Magic Practice, eyes closed to brace for impact. He is not disappointed. Toriel runs straight up to him and latches onto his arm. “You. Me. Partners. I am not accepting any excuses.”

“yeah, okay,” he mumbles.

The last class of the week is always is a lab day, which means they’re actually practicing instead of learning theory and ethics and crap. Usually it’s his favorite day, because he’s free to talk with Toriel all period as long as he at least makes it look like he’s trying to do something magical. But today he wishes the teacher were droning on about ‘never using our powers to hurt or influence humans, because they are extremely fragile despite the strength of their SOULs, and also it’s the law’ or something or anything to get him out of this situation. Quite frankly, he wishes he didn’t exist.

Unfortunately, as Toriel lets go of his arm, he is reminded all too clearly that he does exist, and that she’s going to expect details. 

He gets into dueling position. Dueling is hard for him. He’s good at offense, way better than he lets on in class or in front of anybody—he knows that from practicing with Papyrus as kids—but his defense is crap, and that’s in addition to his condition. He was born with a rare medical problem that made him very weak. A well-placed blow could kill him. That’s part of the reason his dad insisted on him taking this class, because he wanted him to be able to protect himself.

“Sans?”

“what? yeah.”

“Don’t get distracted, you know that is incredibly dangerous for you,” Toriel chides, but then smiles deviously. “Though I don’t blame you, with such a cute datefriend to think about.”

He flushes. “come on, Tori, that’s not—“

“Seriously, how could you keep such an adorable person a secret? From me, even! I knew you were acting weird, but I could never had guessed that was why.” She sighs dreamily. “But love makes fools of us all, huh?”

“l-love?!”

“Oh, you are not there yet? That is all right. I suppose I am getting ahead of myself, in more ways than one.”

He winces. It’s pretty clear, as her eyes mist over, that she’s thinking about Asgore. She’s always been a romantic, and quick to rush into things.

But it’s true, isn’t it? Love has made a fool of him. Just not for the person she thinks.

“hey, who’s getting distracted now?” he says, just to get that look out of her eyes. He can’t stand it. 

“Oh, sorry! You are right.” She concentrates and summons a small fireball, tosses it around between her paws absentmindedly. “You ready?”

“just throw it already,” he gripes.

“All right, all right. Just making sure.”

She throws, and he dodges. She frowns. 

“Sans, you need to learn how to protect yourself sometime. You cannot dodge forever.”

“i can’t help it. it’s reflex.”

“Yes, but…” She hesitates. “I just worry about you, is all. You know that.”

He does know that. It makes him feel all the worse for lying to her. He conjures a bone and plays with it idly to avoid her gaze.

“So…how did you two meet?”

“oh, well…” He can’t say you unhooked him. She doesn’t know about the bullying, and he’d like to keep it that way.

To his horror, she continues. “Surely you must have known each other before they came here, the way you two were acting.”

He freezes. Crap. Crap! He’s not even good at lying! He starts to sweat. “uhhhh…on…line…?”

“Oh?”

“um, yeah. they were…on, uh…a site. a…web site.”

Toriel laughs. “Well, I could have gathered that myself, silly. What kind of website?”

His mind goes completely blank.

“porn.”

Crap.

He…just actually said that, didn’t he.

He chances a look at Toriel, who is blushing intensely. “Um…”

“yeah, uh, they…write erotica…about…” He’s only digging himself deeper, isn’t he. “skeletons!” CRAP! “and, uh, i read it thinking it was a science thing, and i messaged them after realizing and asked them to take it down.” Good, cover your tracks, he thinks. “and then we started talking from there. i didn’t even know they were moving here until recently. um, last week.”

“And that’s why you started eating lunch alone? So you could talk to them without being caught or disrupted!”

Sure, why not. “yyyyyyes?”

“Well, that’s certainly an…unconventional way to meet,” she says, still blushing, “but I’m glad it got you two together! I was so happy when I saw you eating lunch with them. Sharing food and everything! It was so sweet.”

“yep, that’s us. very, uh, sweet.”

“I’m happy for you,” she says quietly, but sincerely. “I was really worried there for a while. And I am glad you finally told me. You are my best friend, Sans.”

His heart pangs again. “yeah, uh…same, Tori.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [2/19/16, 2:04:31 AM] pixelized: OH MY GOD  
> [2/19/16, 2:04:49 AM] Brin: READER-CHAN IS CHUCK TINGLE  
> [2/19/16, 2:05:02 AM] pixelized: I DON'T KNOW WHO THAT IS BUT. AHHHH  
> [2/19/16, 2:05:31 AM] Brin: LIKE I SAID IDK IF I HAVE THE GUTS  
> [2/19/16, 2:05:39 AM] Brin: BUT IT’D BE SO FUNNY  
> [2/19/16, 2:06:03 AM] Brin: IM. GONNA DO IT  
> [2/19/16, 2:06:17 AM] pixelized: NO  
> [2/19/16, 2:06:20 AM] pixelized: NONONONONONONONONON
> 
> i did it sorry ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> talk with reader-chan next chapter!


	6. Sixth Period

Right on the dot when class ends, Sans receives the text he has been dreading from you.

“science room”

And, a few seconds later, a grudging:

“please”

It’s a good choice. There isn’t a class in the science room last period this block, so it’s empty. He walks to the room like one might walk into a certain death. He sees you, already sitting, looking impatiently at your phone.

The only thing he can think of to say as he approaches you is, “your elbows are yellow.”

“Huh?” Confusion fills your face, then understanding. “Oh. Yeah, I was painting.”

“with your elbows?”

“…Yes,” you say defensively.

“all right.” He stands there awkwardly for a few moments before you pat the chair next to you. 

“Sit.”

“okay, uh, yeah.” He hesitates. “are you sure we can’t, like, postpone this? because i have to pick up my brother, and—“

“I’ll drive you,” you hiss. “Sit. And explain.”

He winces. “yeah. um. okay. so, uh…well...i don’t even know where to start, really…”

“How about with why you went from blowing me off one day to calling me ‘honey’ the next?” you ask, sickly sweet.

“blowing you off?” Oh. Lunch. He had kinda done that, hadn’t he. “oh. sorry.”

“I don’t really want an apology. I would, however, like that explanation you promised me.”

“sorry,” he says, before catching himself. “well, so…basically, uh...Toriel saw us eating lunch together and asked me if we were dating and i sort of said yes.”

He peeks at you and blanches. Your face is incredibly, deceptively calm. “And why would you do that?”

“it wasn’t…exactly a well-thought-out decision? it’s just, Tori’s got this new boyfriend, and i got really jealous, and i sort of thought maybe if i were dating somebody then she might get jealous too, and—yeah.”

He risks another glance and feels like weeping. You’re staring at him with a look that might best be described as ‘murderous’. “We’ve only known each other for three days!”

“technically we’ve known each other for a few months.”

“What?”

“that’s what i told Toriel, anyway.”

You look like you might scream. “Is that so.”

“i didn’t mean to bring you into it, honest! like i said, i made a mistake—“

“A mistake?!” you screech, and he shrinks back. “This isn’t a mistake, Sans! This is you dragging somebody else into a lie! And it’s not okay. I’m not going to just stand for this. You’re going to tell them, or I am.”

His jaw drops in horror. He had never even thought that you might tell. “no!” he yelps. “Toriel hates liars, she’d never forgive me—“

“Well you should have thought of that beforehand, you—“

“i love her!”

You fall completely silent.

He laughs bitterly. “heh. first time i say it out loud and it’s to my fake datefriend. just my luck, huh?”

You frown, but still say nothing.

He sighs, then looks away. “look. fine. tell her. it’s my fault anyway. i’ll take the blame.”

“…Fine.”

“fine what?”

“We can do,” you wave your hands around vaguely, “this thing.”

You hate that you think it’s sort of cute how his face immediately lights up like a kid on his birthday.

“But!” You hold up your hand. “Only because I’m the nicest person in the world, and you had better know that.”

“thank you so much—“

“And I set the ground rules. I’m not going to do anything I’m uncomfortable with and you’re not going to argue. Okay?”

“yeah, yeah, of course!”

“And never call me ‘honey’ again, please. That was weird.”

“no problem, boss.”

You look skyward. “I can’t believe I’m actually doing this. Okay. Get your stuff.”

“huh?”

“To pick up your brother, right? I promised. My car isn’t that far away, come on.”

The walk to the car is awkward. You refuse to look at Sans, so he takes the opportunity to study you. A slight frown is still etched into your features, but you’re pretty attractive, he supposes. Even with—he glances at your side—suspiciously yellow elbows.

When you reach the car, he awkwardly clambers into the front seat and buckles up, because safety first. You turn the ignition, and something in Japanese starts blaring out. You shriek and pause it before changing it to something electronic.

“…was that the theme song to Mew Mew Kissy Cutie?”

“Maybe. Shut up.”

“Alphys is gonna love you.”

“Ooh. Is she going to fake date me too?”

“ha ha. no.”

“Which one is Alphys anyway?”

“she’s the one in our science class. yellow, sort of lizard-y?”

“Oh, yeah. And, uh…I’m guessing Toriel is one of the goat monsters. Which one?”

“the pretty one, obviously.”

“I have no idea what you define as ‘pretty’, so I reiterate, which one?”

“she’s smaller. the bigger one is Asgore, her…boyfriend.”

You nod. “Gotcha. I’ll keep that in mind. So, how were you planning on making her jealous, anyway?”

“like i said, i never really thought it out. i sort of hoped it would just happen when she saw me with someone else. but…she’s a good friend, she’s happy for us.”

You’re quiet a moment. “She sounds like a great person, huh?”

“she really, really is.”

“Does she know you have this big dorky crush on her?” you ask curiously.

“no! i mean…i don’t think so. i hope not.”

“Why? Not saying it’ll happen either way, but there’s no way you two would ever get together if she doesn’t even know you’re into her.”

“i can’t just…tell her! that’s not how it works!”

“How does it work then?”

“i don’t know, i’ve never done this before!” he says, flustered.

You laugh. “Okay, okay. Different topic of conversation. This brother of yours, what’s he like?”

Now this he can talk about. “he’s a super cool kid. his name is Papyrus. he’s really into cooking lately, but he’s totally terrible at it. but…yeah, he’s like…the nicest, most genuine person you’ll ever meet. he truly doesn’t hate anyone. and he’s really open, like, he doesn’t hide from you. i admire him for that.”

“He sounds great. And you sound like you care for him a lot,” you observe lightly.

“i do. he’s like the one good thing in my life, you know? like everything else can be going wrong, is going wrong, and then he’s there and it’s all okay.”

You smile gently, and he’s taken aback. He’s never seen you smile like that before. “I’m glad you have someone like that, Sans.” You sound almost…sad, though?

“…yeah.”

It’s a short car drive to the middle school, and before he knows it, you have arrived. The parking lot is crowded, so maneuvering is a little difficult, but he has to admit it’s a lot better than the walking.

He sees Papyrus and grins. Sans rolls down the window and waves wildly. “hey, Pap!”

Papyrus seems confused, and Sans suddenly realizes he’s in an unfamiliar car with a person Papyrus doesn’t know. No wonder.

“i…should probably get out and walk him home,” he says, already opening the door.

“Oh! Yeah, of course. I probably wouldn’t trust him in the car with me either.”

“it’s not a trust thing, i just have to explain to him—wait, what? is there a reason i shouldn’t trust you in a car?”

You wink exaggeratedly. “Bye, Sans. See you later.”

Then you zoom off at a truly astonishing and, indeed, worrisome speed. He watches you go and wonders whether he should have gotten into a car with you in the first place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i've painted with my elbows before it's fun
> 
> middle school parking lots are Hell on Earth btw
> 
> i wrote all this on a plane and im tired so forgive any mistakes lol... ✌


	7. Day 2: Period 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cw for fighting with a parent

“WHO WAS THAT?” asks Papyrus, naturally, when Sans reaches him and they start walking home together.

Sans instantly feels very tired. “uh…can we talk about this later?”

“LATER LIKE WHEN DAD GETS HOME?”

Sans whips his head around to glare at Papyrus. “you wouldn’t dare.”

“THE GREAT PAPYRUS IS VERY DARING!”

“ugh, fine! it’s…a friend. a new friend. we were talking and lost track of time so they offered to drive me over here.”

Papyrus squints, then queries, “THEN WHY DID YOU NOT WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT? SOMETHING IS FISHY, BROTHER.”

Crap. Pap is too smart for his own good. “yeah, uh…” Sans sighs and scratches his head. “fine, okay. when i say ‘friend’ i might mean…’datefriend’?”

Papyrus gasps excitedly. “WOWIE!”

“yeah, yeah.”

“YOU GOT A DATEFRIEND? WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN?”

“very, uh, recently.”

“WHY DIDN’T THEY STICK AROUND? I WANT TO MEET THEM! WE CAN BE THE BEST OF FRIENDS! WITHOUT THE ‘DATE’ PART! NYEH HEH HEH!”

Sans winces at Papyrus’ enthusiasm. “it’s…kinda complicated, Pap…”

“WHAT IS COMPLICATED ABOUT TRUE LOVE?”

Sans puts up his hands. “whoa, whoa, who said anything about love?”

“ISN’T THAT WHAT DATING IS ABOUT?”

“yeah, but…”

“THEN WHY NOT ADMIT YOUR LOVE FOR THEM?”

“because i don’t! love them, i mean! i love Toriel!” And with that, it’s out. Sans has never been able to lie to Papyrus.

Papyrus frowns. “THEN WHY ARE YOU DATING SOMEBODY ELSE?”

“there was a…misunderstanding, and i said i was dating them, and now i can’t tell Tori because she’ll hate me for lying to her, and my fake datefriend definitely hates me for dragging them into it, and it’s all a huge mess and everything is terrible.”

Papyrus considers this. Then, he says, “A TRUE FRIEND WOULDN’T CARE. ISN’T THAT WHAT YOU ALWAYS TOLD ME, SANS? THAT A TRUE FRIEND WOULDN’T CARE THAT I DON’T HAVE AN INDOOR VOICE OR THAT I DON’T UNDERSTAND THINGS SOMETIMES OR THAT I REALLY LOVE PUZZLES, BECAUSE A TRUE FRIEND WILL BE THERE FOR YOU NO MATTER WHAT? IF TORIEL IS A TRUE FRIEND THEN SHE WON’T CARE. SHE’LL FORGIVE YOU.”

He had said that thing about the true friends, but this was Papyrus! Everybody loves Papyrus. “i can’t risk it, bro. i can’t lose her.”

“HMM. WELL, OK. I WILL CONSULT MY DATING BOOK WHEN WE GET HOME TO SEE WHAT TO DO.”

“you have a dating book?”

“I HAVE SEVERAL!” 

“why?”

“IT NEVER HURTS TO BE PREPARED, SANS.”

Sans chuckles, and for once today, the roiling in his stomach eases and he feels a bit better. “that’s true, Pap.”

When they reach home, the door is already unlocked, which isn’t a good sign. Sans summons a bone just in case and wields it like a baseball bat, then sneaks into the kitchen—

“Hello, boys.”

It’s their father, sitting at the dining room table.

“DAD! HELLO!”

Sans dissolves the bone and crosses his arms. “what are you doing home so early?”

Gaster smiles tightly. “Papyrus, please go upstairs and do your homework.”

“WHAT? BUT—“

“Do as I say, please.” His voice is strained. “I need to talk to your brother alone. Maybe listen to some music? Please.”

Everybody involved knows what that means. There’s going to be yelling.

Papyrus looks like he wants to stay, but he finally nods and goes up the stairs.

Sans wracks his brain for what he’s done wrong this time. His dad has a problem with pretty much everything Sans does, so it’s hard to tell—

“Sans. Can you explain to me why Mr. Staehl found me during lunch today and informed me that you are failing P.E.?”

Oh. That. He folds in on himself.

“probably because i am,” Sans says, struggling to keep his voice even, disinterested.

“Hm. And can you explain why you didn’t tell me about this?”

“because i knew this would happen?”

“What exactly is ‘this’?”

“you jumping on me for something that’s out of my control!”

“Out of your control?!” Crap, he’s gone and done it now. “How is this out of your control? How are you even failing P.E.?!”

“maybe it’s hard for me, okay?”

“Mr. Staehl said you don’t even put in any effort. He said you hide behind that friend of yours, Undyne, all the time.”

“why ask if you knew the answer?” Sans mutters, and looks at the ground. His shoes are suddenly very interesting.

“Because I was hoping you had some kind of explanation! You do realize if you fail a class right now you won’t graduate, right?”

“yeah, i know.”

“So do you want to graduate or not?”

“of course i want to graduate.”

“Good. Then you’re going to go to your teacher tomorrow and explain that you will do anything to get your grade up, do you understand?”

“yes,” he mumbles.

“Pardon?”

“yes, sir!” he yells mockingly and salutes. 

“I’ll pretend I didn’t hear that. Now go up to your room and do your homework.”

Sans nods sharply, then storms up to his room. Instead of doing his homework, though, he flops down onto his bed and screams into his pillow.

A hesitant knock sounds through the room. “SANS?”

“Pap, i’m not really in the mood right now.”

“IT’S IMPORTANT.”

Sans exhales heavily. “all right. come in.”

Papyrus enters the room slowly, making a face as always at its messy state. For a while he just stands there.

“so?”

“OH, RIGHT!” Papyrus offers up a shy smile. “I CONSULTED MY DATING BOOKS!”

“oh, jeez.” Sans’ head is starting to hurt.

“TURNS OUT THIS IS NOT A SITUATION THEY KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH!”

Sans huffs. “heh, yeah, i sort of thought so.”

“BUT, THEY DO ALL SAY ONE THING. IF YOU LIKE SOMEONE YOU SHOULD TELL THEM! AND THEY ALSO SAY THAT COMMUNICATION IS IMPORTANT IN A GOOD RELATIONSHIP! I THINK YOU SHOULD COMMUNICATE TO TORIEL THAT YOU LOVE HER!”

Groaning, Sans shoves his face in his pillow again. “you too? i can’t do that.”

“WHY NOT?”

“i just can’t. i don’t even know how i would say it!”

From somewhere on his person, Papyrus whips out a book. “WELL, LET’S JUST LOOK AT THE LATER SECTIONS! IT SAYS WHEN YOU REALLY LOVE SOMEONE, YOU LICK—“

Sans yelps and swipes the book away from Papyrus. “where did you even find this crap?”

“MY FRIEND METTATON LENT IT TO ME.”

“well, i’m confiscating it.”

“THAT’S FINE. I AM ALREADY A DATING MASTER.”

“i’m sure you are, Pap. now please leave me to my teenage angst.”

“SURE, I GUESS. BUT YOU SHOULD THINK ABOUT THE BOOK’S ADVICE.”

“i will,” Sans says insincerely. “thanks.”

“GOOD!” With that, Papyrus leaves the room, and Sans returns to his pillow.

Life, he thinks to himself, sucks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> more family shenanigans
> 
> next chapter: your thoughts on the situation, and the happy couple takes on friday


	8. Day 2: Period 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> food cw

Life, you think to yourself, sucks. 

You drove home and immediately fell asleep from pure emotional exhaustion, and also probably because you had only slept for three hours the night before. Now it is 9 PM, and you missed dinner, and you are hungry, and you still have a ton of homework to do (most of it science, ugh), and worst of all, you are still fake-dating Sans.

Why on earth had you agreed to go along with the charade? You hate lying with a vehement passion. And you’re bad at it, too. There’s no way they won’t find out, and then they’ll hate you, and your only chance at making friends in this terrible small town will go down the tube along with all your hopes and dreams. 

Catastrophizing, you try to remind yourself. You’re catastrophizing. Not everything is worst-case-scenario.

But if this isn’t the worst case scenario, it is still a pretty crappy scenario. You’ve seen enough movies and read enough fanfiction to know that fake dating always ends up going badly, and also with the two people who are fake dating getting together, but that will never happen so you emphatically put that aside. So why did you agree?

But, you reflect, you sort of know why. His face when he said he would tell Toriel looked so lost, so hopeless. He looked like his whole world was falling apart. And, as much as you hate it about yourself, you’re sort of a sucker for people with Problems. You make up for your non-existent self-esteem by dedicating your whole life to helping other people and not caring about your own feelings. It’s kind of an issue. Heck, there’s a reason you’ve been going to therapy. (Another thing that fell by the wayside when you moved, by the way). 

You should just tell everybody, you think. Tell Sans you can’t do this after all, say sorry, but you’re on your own, pal. But you can’t do it, and you know it. Telling would be breaking a promise, and the only thing you hate more than lying is breaking promises.

You seriously contemplate going back to sleep just so you don’t have to think about it anymore. Sleeping is so much easier than living.

But, you groan mentally, homework. Fine. Okay. You can do this. You were a good student once, weren’t you?

Your treacherous eyes stray over to your computer, and you bite your lip. Just one episode couldn’t hurt, right…?

\------------

The next day, you stagger your way over to the pavilion, which you had learned via a Sans text is their ‘spot’. You sit heavily down at the table.

“wow. you look like crap.”

“Sans!” comes a chiding voice from across the table—Toriel, you’re guessing—and you feel him shrug against your shoulder. 

“what? they do.”

“You are not supposed to say that, though!”

“Nah, he’s right,” you say with a yawn. “I stayed up until like 3 in the morning. I was watching this show, and then before I knew it I had watched five episodes and I had to do homework and…yeah. It was not the best string of decisions I have ever made.”

“You need to take better care of yourself,” she says gently, and a part of you realizes why Sans loves her.

“Don’t I know it,” you laugh bitterly. Then your eyes focus, and you frown. “Speaking of…Sans, seriously? Only chisps again?”

“yeah, seriously.”

“That’s all he ever eats,” says Undyne in between noisy chews. 

You pull your lunch out from your backpack and look it over analytically. Earlier this morning, you had been the kind of tired that made you hyper, so you had gotten up early to make yourself rice and tofu. Not as easy to split in half as a sandwich, but it will do.

“All right. I have both a fork and chopsticks, so you can choose. I’ll warn you though, the rice is a lot easier with the fork,” you say, businesslike.

“i’m really fine—“

“Y-you made him a bento?” asks Alphys, and you wince. Crap. It does look that way, doesn’t it.

“Uhhhh…I mean…”

“That’s so sweet! This one time, in Mew Mew Kissy Cutie—“ She starts talking rapidly.

“You mean when she made the bento for that guy in her class, but she was so nervous she forgot to leave the note with it?” You respond semi-automatically. You don’t even think much of it until you hear a sound not unlike that of a boiling kettle.

You look over to Alphys and find her squealing. “You—you watch—“

“Oh. Uh, yeah, I’ve seen it before.”

Sans crunches on his chisps and adds smugly, “they were listening to the OP in their car yesterday.”

“In their car?” Undyne grins wickedly. 

“oh, uh, they just—drove me to Pap’s school is all—“

“Are you sure that was all that happened? Two new lovers, alone in a car together…anything could happen, right?”

You blanch. “N-nothing happened!” you protest, and curse yourself for stuttering. 

“Ooooooh.”

“Shut up!” you growl, then whip your head over to look at Sans, who is snickering quietly. “And you! Don’t think I didn’t notice you trying to get out of eating.” You spear a forkful of rice and hold it in front of his face angrily. “Open.”

“uhhh…”

“I said open!”

He opens his mouth awkwardly, and you shove the rice into his mouth. “There. Your germs are all over the fork now, so you have to eat more.”

“but—“

“Like I said, I don’t make the rules, Sans,” you say teasingly.

“Look, they’re already feeding each other, Tori,” booms Asgore happily.

Next to you, Sans freezes.

Tori. That was Sans’ nickname for her. Asgore couldn’t just—

But he could, couldn’t he. And Sans can’t say anything about it. He doesn’t have that right.

Moodily, he starts shoveling rice into his mouth.

You have frozen for a completely different reason. Crap. You had just fed him, hadn’t you. You weren’t really even thinking about anything other than getting that horrid smirk off of Sans’ face. You peek at him. Well, he’s not smirking anymore, but it looks like you’ve made things awkward. You are so bad at this fake dating thing.

Eventually, the conversation at the table continues on without you, as you both sit and eat silently.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i dont like this chapter
> 
> o well


	9. Day 2: Period 3

As lunch draws to a close, you rise from your place at the table and stretch. “Guess I’d better get going. Sans, Undyne, you two coming?”

“there are still ten minutes until lunch is over…”

You pout. “I like being early, fight me.”

“I’ll fight you!” says Undyne, too enthusiastically for your liking. 

You grimace. “Maybe, uh…later…”

“Just kidding, punk!” She claps you hard on the back and mutters in your ear, “I would pulverize you.”

You look up at her in horror, but she just laughs boisterously and starts to skip off in the direction of the gym.

Alphys watches her go dreamily. “I-isn’t she great?”

“Um…she sure is very…something.”

“I know,” she sighs, and you grin at her, waggling your eyebrows. Her eyes widen and she starts flapping her hands about wildly. “W-wait, no, not like that! I mean, probably! No, I mean, definitely. I think? She doesn’t—I wouldn’t—well, I would—“ She blushes intensely and looks down at her shoes. 

“Undyne totally would too,” says Sans lightly, and Alphys turns even darker.

You take pity on the poor girl and shove Sans. “Hush. Off you get.”

“but—“

You give him a meaningful look, and he exhales heavily. “fine. see ya.” Then, he trudges off in the same direction as Undyne.

“Thank you,” whispers Alphys. You wave her thanks off. You know how sucky it can be to be the center of attention like that.

You feel a presence behind you and turn around. Toriel looms over you, beaming. “You are very kind.”

“Huh?” Your eyebrows wrinkle together, and you blink up at her.

“I like you,” she declares brightly.

“Oh, uh…”

“I’m glad you and Sans are together. He was acting so strange for a while there. For a moment I even thought—well!” She claps her hands together. “That’s unimportant. The point is, I am so glad you’ve come.”

“Oh. Um. Thanks.” You cringe at the sincere praise. You don’t deserve it. You are lying scum.

“Well, we’d all best be off!” Toriel takes Asgore’s hand and smiles up at him warmly. “I’ll see you again after school, all right?”

“Until then,” he rumbles fondly, and brings her hand up to his mouth for a light kiss. Oh, jeez, they’re one of those couples. But then they, too, part ways, and you’re left with Alphys.

You must be making a really obvious Face, because Alphys takes one look at you and giggles. “Sorry, I-I know they can be, u-um…a bit…much.”

“Oh! No! It’s just…” You wrinkle your nose. “Romance, ew.”

Alphys looks at you curiously.

You realize how strange that must sound coming from someone in a committed relationship and backpedal hurriedly. “I mean, uh, except for…with Sans, yeah! Us two, we just love, um, romancing it up. Just, ya know, all over the place, we’re just…” You spread your hands and end helplessly, “So romance-y.”

“…Yeah.” She doesn’t really sound convinced, unsurprisingly, and you deflate. Crap, one day in and already the jig is up. 

“Hey, uh…I have to leave, like, um…right now…” Oh, crap, the bell. “But, um—do you want to maybe…partner up in Science?”

“Oh! Yeah, sure. That’d be great.” You smile sincerely at her, and a smile creeps onto her face as well. She waves once and then scurries off.

You take off at a dead sprint to your own class. Fricking friends, making you be late.

But. Friends. It’s sort of nice to have them again. Even if it’s based on a lie.

You get to the gym without a minute to spare and find it…empty? Well, there is a class there, but you don’t recognize anyone—

Sans runs up to you, panting. “health. today. end of week. crap. i can’t believe you made me run again.”

“Huh?”

He points to a set of trailers adjacent to the gym. “end of the week we always have Health instead of P.E. it’s a state requirement or something.”

“Oh, crap.” 

You look down at his sleeve and contemplate grabbing it to run over to the classroom. He snatches it away and cradles his arm in his other arm with a wounded look. “nope. never again.”

You both decide to power walk over to the classroom instead and reach it fairly quickly.

“Sans. _______. So nice of you to join us.”

“Sorry, I didn’t know—“

Mr. Staehl squints at you. “Yeah, yeah. I’ll let you get away with it this time. Now sit.”

You sit, Sans behind you and Undyne in front. Mr. Staehl looks down at the desk in the front of the room, peering at his notes. “Right, then…we’re actually starting a new unit today.”

You perk up. That’s actually helpful for you, because it means that you don’t have to catch up with the last unit’s material.

Mr. Staehl continues, “Now, I’m going to need you guys to be particularly mature about this one—“

Wait. Oh, no.

“Because, yes, this unit is on sex.”

Undyne turns around to watch you as a slow, sharklike grin spreads across her face. You turn pale.

“Now, as I’m sure you all know, monster sex and human sex is by nature different—“

You bury your head in your hands.

“But not by necessity incompatible, for the record—“

Your cheeks are heating up rapidly. You can hear Undyne sniggering. You’d take a peek at Sans, but you think doing so might make you explode.

“Anyway, we’re going to start off with this video. It’s a remastered edition of The Miracle of Life. I’d like you all to fill out this worksheet while you’re watching.” Here, he passes out the aforementioned worksheet, and you look down numbly.

Question 7. How do interspecies couples have intercourse?

You have to turn around to pass the worksheet to Sans, who is flushed a bright blue, hoodie shadowing his eyes. You give him a small, apologetic smile, and he nods miserably, almost imperceptibly. 

You turn to face the board again and see Undyne hunched over, silently pounding her fists against the desk in her laughter. Well. At least somebody is having fun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> goal: to make every interaction between sans and reader-chan as awkward as possible


	10. Day 2: Period 4

After what was probably the most awkward class of your life, and with promises of more to come, you can’t wait to get out of the classroom. Sans, however, is hanging back.

“Sans? You coming?”

“yeah, uh…just wait a sec.”

You nod, frowning, but wait outside the door to give him privacy.

Sans walks to Mr. Staehl’s desk, and Mr. Staehl looks up. “Ah, Sans. I was expecting to see you.”

“you told my dad, so yeah,” Sans mutters.

“Sans, please understand I just want what’s best for you. Your dad, too. I didn’t want to see you come to the end of the semester and realize there was no going back. And I’m sure you don’t want to retake this class any more than I want you to retake it.”

“yeah, i guess.” Sans scuffs his shoes against the floor. “so is there anything i can do?”

“As a matter of fact, yes. You seem to have made friends with the new kid. They’re having some difficulty adjusting to the class themselves. I just want you to help them out, make sure they pass the class as well. Sound all right?”

“that’s it?”

“That’s it. I don’t want you to fail, Sans, I just want you to get involved.”

“fine. yeah, i can do that.” Mr. Staehl nods and looks back down at his desk. “oh, and uh…sir? thanks.”

“No problem, kid.”

When he exits the room, he’s faintly surprised to see you still waiting for him. Undyne has left already. “when i said wait a sec, i didn’t mean to literally wait.”

“Yeah, I know. Come on. Wouldn’t want to be late for Papa’s class.” You flash a grin at him, and he groans.

As you two walk together to the Science classroom, something occurs to him. “hey, um…thanks for being such a good sport about all…this. i know my friends are being kind of jerks about it.”

“Nah, they’re fine,” you assure him. “And like I said, I’m the nicest person in the world, remember? I can deal with a bit of ribbing.”

“heh…ribbing.” When you don’t get it, he gestures to his chest.

You brighten. “I hadn’t even thought about that! Wow, nice and a pun master. You hit the fake datefriend jackpot.”

“those were actually the only two criteria i had on my fake datefriend requirement list, so good job.”

“I hope your real datefriend requirement list has higher standards,” you joke lightly.

“yeah, anybody who wants to be my real datefriend has to like piña coladas and getting caught in the rain. non-negotiable, that.”

“Oh, ew. I hate pineapples. Guess I’m out.”

“what about making love at midnight?”

You shove him in response.

You both arrive at the Science classroom just before the bell rings. He sits down, expecting you to sit next to him, but you point at Alphys, who waves. “Sorry, I promised this period to Alphys.”

“ouch.”

“You’ll live.” You pat him on the skull in passing and make your way over to her.

Prior to your arrival in the class, there had been an even number of students. Now there’s an odd number, which means one person per class has to go without a partner. Since you had both arrived with little time to spare, it meant that Sans didn’t have time to find a partner, so he is now the lucky one out. He doesn’t mind, though. It’s better than being with, for example, Aaron.

Aaron is the leader of the Jock Team—well, not counting Asgore, who is the actual ‘leader’ but doesn’t engage in any bullying—and the bane of Sans’ existence. He is also surprisingly good at science, which is why he’s in the advanced class. 

The advanced class is composed almost entirely of seniors, with a couple of prodigy juniors like Alphys. It’s actually technically AP Chemistry, but everybody just calls it Science. Sans isn’t really into chemistry, he’s more of a physics guy, but it’s pretty easy for him nonetheless.

You, however, are struggling. Alphys does her best to quietly explain to you the basic principles behind the lab you’re doing today, but she isn’t very good at simplifying her language, so you find yourself just as lost as when Dr. Gaster is lecturing to the whole class. You end the class understanding about as much as when you started.

You’ve always felt pretty comfortable talking to your teachers, but Dr. Gaster sort of gives off an unapproachable vibe, so you’re nervous when you stay after class to talk to him. “Hey, um, Dr. Gaster?”

“Yes?”

“So…I’m new, obviously, and I’m sort of having trouble. Is there anything I can do to better understand the material?”

“Are you doing all of the required reading?”

You flush in embarrassment. “I try to.” ‘Trying’ is the operative word there.

“Hm. Well, apart from that, there’s not really much I can think of, but I suppose if you ever have any questions you can ask me after class. Would that help?”

“Yeah, I guess?” You bite your lip, thinking. “I’ll try to figure out the rest on my own. Thanks anyway, though.”

“Of course.”

He watches you leave and sees Sans waiting for you. Interesting.

Outside the classroom, Sans asks, “why did you need to talk to my dad?”

“I’m spying on you,” you drawl. “He asked me to give regular reports.”

“ha ha. no, but seriously.”

“I was asking him if there’s anything I could do to understand the material better. I’m completely lost here.” You sigh, scratching your head. “I don’t know what to do, honestly. If something doesn’t change I’m totally going to fail.”

“do you need this class to graduate?”

“Not technically, but…” You shrug. “I still can’t fail.”

“yeah, i guess i sort of know what you mean.”

You walk together to the entrance, and Sans hesitates, his conscience pulling at him. “hey, uh…if you want i could give you some pointers sometime. it’s my best subject, so…”

You look at him, eyes wide and hopeful. “Would you really do that?”

Ugh. Obligations. But you are kind of doing him a major favor by agreeing to go along with the fake dating thing, and also…maybe he could get something else out of it? “how about this. you drive me to Pap’s school every day, and while we’re driving we can go over science stuff.”

“Deal,” you say immediately. “Thank you so much, you’re seriously the best.”

“yeah, yeah.” He smirks and adds, “but no mew mew kissy cutie in the car.”

You pout and mumble something that sounds suspiciously like, “One time. It was one time.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is basically just setting stuff up for future chapters so
> 
> i never took ap chem myself so i wont probably give any details on that, but it was p common for the AP Crowd in my school to take bio, chem, then ap bio and ap chem in that order so i'm going based off that


	11. Day 2: Period 5

This time, when you arrive at the parking lot of Papyrus’ school, Papyrus is ready. He runs to the car before Sans can exit, opens the door, and buckles himself in the back seat.

“whoa, whoa!”

“HELLO, FAKE DATEFRIEND!” He squeaks a little bit in his excitement.

You laugh, seemingly unfazed. “Well, hey! I’m guessing you’re Papyrus?”

“THE GREAT,” he corrects loftily.

“Ah, yes. The great Papyrus. My bad.”

Papyrus nods approvingly. “I LIKE THEM, BROTHER.”

“yeah, they’re okay. listen, we need to get out—“

“THE GREAT PAPYRUS DOES NOT WALK HOME! THE GREAT PAPYRUS RIDES IN STYLE!”

“the great Papyrus will walk home if he wants to get home,” threatens Sans.

“I don’t mind driving you both home,” you say. Sans scowls at you, but you don’t look penitent at all. “Come on, I’d love to get to know P—the great Papyrus better. He’s delightful!”

“DO YOU HEAR THAT, BROTHER?” asks Papyrus smugly. “I’M DELIGHTFUL.”

“why are you both ganging up on me? whatever happened to ‘i wouldn’t trust him in the car with me either’?”

“Come on, I’d never drive dangerously with such an important passenger in the car.” Sans frowns, and you poke him in the shoulder. “Give me a little credit.”

“…fine. if we die it’s your fault though.” Sans slams his door shut and crosses his arms.

“Aw, don’t be like that,” you coo. “Babydoll.”

“what the frick?”

“Revenge for calling me honey.”

“ok, sweetiepie.”

“Sugarbuns.”

“love muffin.”

“Light of my life.”

“THIS IS LOVELY AND ALL, BUT THE PEOPLE BEHIND US ARE GETTING ANGRY.”

“Whoops! Sorry.” You press on the gas pedal, and Sans absolutely does not shriek as you zoom forward. 

As you drive to their house, Papyrus peppers you with questions. “SO, FAKE DATEFRIEND, WHAT IS YOUR NAME?”

You shoot Sans an amused glance. “I can see he talks a lot about me.”

“NOT REALLY, NO. HE WAS VERY RELUCTANT TO INTRODUCE YOU.”

“Gotcha. Well, my name is _______.”

“WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FLAVOR OF SPRINKLE?”

“The red kind, definitely.”

“DO YOU LIKE SPAGHETTI?”

“About as much as the next person.”

“HOW MUCH DOES THE NEXT PERSON LIKE SPAGHETTI?”

“So much,” you decide.

“EXCELLENT. YOU SHOULD JOIN US FOR DINNER TONIGHT THEN!”

Sans raises his hands in protest. “whoa, okay, no. first off, they are not going to come over for dinner anytime soon. second off, you’re not making spaghetti tonight. Dad would flip.”

“AW, BUT—“

“no buts here, buddy.”

Papyrus pouts, but returns to his questioning. “DO YOU ENJOY RAINBOWS?”

Eventually, you reach their house. “Hey, well, it was amazing to meet you, Papyrus! I hope we can talk again sometime soon.”

“YES! I HOPE THE SAME, FAKE DATEFRIEND!”

You smile and wave as he leaves the car and runs to the front door and whisper to Sans, “You’re right. He’s great.”

“isn’t he, though?” He doesn’t even try to stop the affectionate tone from leaking into his voice.

“Yep. Well, uh…thanks for letting me meet him, and all. I know you didn’t really want me to drive him, so…”

“nah, i mean. we’re all alive.” Sans pauses and adds, “in a manner of speaking,” gesturing broadly to himself. 

You giggle. “Hey, you’re pretty punny yourself.”

“yeah, guess so, huh?” He privately resolves to try to make you giggle more often. It’s a nice sound. “well. bye then.” He opens the passenger door, gets out, and shuts it. 

You roll down the window and yell, “Bye, pookie!”

He turns to retort, but you’re already racing away.

\-------------

That night at dinner—Fridays they all try to actually sit down together—Gaster swallows and asks, “So, you seem to be getting along with the new kid well enough.”

Sans freezes and looks wildly at Papyrus, who shakes his head with wide eyes. “uhhh…yeah, i…guess?”

Gaster observes this exchange with a raised eyebrow. “You guess?”

“yeah, they’re, um. fine. like, uh! like not terrible, not fine like attractive!”

Gaster narrows his eyes, but takes another bite. Curiouser and curiouser.

“I see. And did you talk to Mr. Staehl?”

“yeah.”

“What did he say?”

“he just asked me to keep an eye on the new kid. he said i needed to get involved, or something.”

“Well, that’s nice of him. I should thank him on Monday.”

Sans groans. “jeez, Dad, please don’t. that’s so embarrassing.”

“Fine, I won’t. Papyrus, how was your day?”

“IT WAS GREAT! MY FRIEND METTATON INTRODUCED ME TO HIS COUSIN NAPSTABLOOK, AND TOGETHER WE CONQUERED—“ Sans nearly lets out a sigh of relief as the conversation turns away from him. These family dinners are his least favorite part of the weekend, but at least Gaster spends most of his time talking to Pap anyway.

He finishes eating quickly. “can i be excused?”

“Yes, you may.”

He cleans off his plate and runs upstairs. Fridays he always talks to Toriel until they go to sleep. It’s a tradition. He starts up his computer and Skype and accepts the call already waiting.

“hey, Tori.”

“Hey, Sans! I was hoping we would still do this.”

“why wouldn’t we?”

“Well, you know…with Asgore, and with ______, I just thought…maybe you might be busy, is all.”

“i wouldn’t give this up with you for anything,” he says truthfully, and he can hear the smile in her voice.

“Good. Me neither. Now how were classes today…?”

Hours later, he hears Toriel yawning. “hey, you should get to sleep.”

“I’m not—that tired—“ She punctuates that with another yawn.

“heh, yeah right.” They both fall silent for a moment. “hey, Tori?”

“Yeah?”

“do you think—if you weren’t with Asgore, and i weren’t with ______—maybe—“

“Maybe what?”

“…nothing. i’m pretty tired myself. i’m gonna go to bed.”

“Mmm, all right. Night, Sans.”

“night, Tori.”

He ends the call and stares at her icon. It’s a picture of her, the sun shining through her fur and making her look ethereal. He loves that picture.

“i love you,” he whispers to the Toriel in the icon. 

He only wishes he had the courage to say it to the real Toriel.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im stuck in my room with nothing else to do but write lol so here's another chapter
> 
> i looked up a list of 'pet names for boyfriend' for this chapter and boy was it something


	12. Day 2: Period 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> food ment

You get home after driving Sans and Papyrus to their house a bit later than usual. Your mom is sitting at the couch in the living room on her computer and notes, “Hey. Stay after to talk with a teacher?”

You hesitate. “Yeah, sorta. But then I drove a friend home. Sorry.”

“No need to be sorry! I’m glad you’re making friends. Are they nice?”

“Yeah, sure.” You cast about for something to say, then offer, “One of them has a little brother who’s super cute.”

Your mom smiles deviously. “Cute?”

You roll your eyes. “Cute like a puppy, Mom. He’s in eighth grade.”

“Okay, okay.”

“Yeah, so I’ll probably be a bit later coming home. This friend offered to help me with science if I’d drive him to pick up his younger brother, so…it’ll be sort of an every day thing.”

“I see. Well, I’m glad you’ve made arrangements. I know you’ve been having trouble with that class.”

“Yep.” You start making your way upstairs, but stop when your mom calls out to you.

“Oh, yeah! Don’t forget you’re babysitting tomorrow.”

You grimace. “Mom…”

“Come on, they’re in the neighborhood. They seem like sweet kids. Easy money?”

“Okay, fine.” You turn to leave again.

“______?”

“Yeah?”

“I really am glad you’re making friends. I was worried there for a bit. I know things have been rough for you with the move,” she says softly.

You smile tightly. “Yeah, well, it’s all fine now, so.”

“All right.”

She watches you go and hopes you’re telling the truth.

Friday nights have always been lonely for you. Even back at your old school with your old friends, you had never really been the type to go out and do things. You just stayed on your computer and talked online when you weren’t watching Netflix or doing something else equally inane.

You log onto Headspace—who are you kidding, you’re always logged into Headspace—and check. You have new friend requests from Alphys (probably took her this long to work up the courage to click the button) and Sans (probably didn’t care enough until now), and, to your delight, Papyrus (didn’t know your name until today). It looks like Undyne, Toriel, and Asgore all added you yesterday as soon as school got out. You accept all of the pending requests in one fell swoop and immediately get a message from Alphys.

ALPHYS 6:30 PM  
hey!

ALPHYS 6:30 PM  
i’m so glad u added me i was. Getting kind of worried lol

ALPHYS 6:31 PM  
(jk)

ALPHYS 6:31 PM  
(maybe not so jk)

You respond.

_______ 6:31 PM  
oh hey! sorry i didnt respond earlier i was kind of bingewatching legendsmashers lol…

ALPHYS 6:32 PM  
oh i love that show! some of the science is kind of suspect sometimes but i love how creative they are! :B

_______ 6:32 PM  
i know rite? its sorta addicting lol

You both chat about LegendSmashers for a while—your favorite is the redhead, while her favorite is the one with the walrus mustache—before you turn to Mew Mew Kissy Cutie. It turns out it’s her absolute favorite of All Time and that she’s kind of an expert on it. Your personal favorite is Freshly Baked Bread!, which she hasn’t seen before but promises to watch. Then you swap AMVs for a while before you get tired.

ALPHYS 11:32 PM  
hey goodnight!

________ 11:33 PM  
nite. and uh hey alphys?

ALPHYS 11:33 PM  
yeah?

________ 11:34 PM  
thanks for talking to me

________ 11:35 PM  
<3

________ has changed their status to ‘Busy’. 

ALPHYS  
just now

Omg

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StrongFish91 ?

Like Reply

ALPHYS nothing >v>;;;

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ALPHYS (talk to me on message omg)

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ALPHYS (new kid is a total flirt and i’m dying pls send help)

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\--------- 

You wake up around eight the next day—earlier than normal for a weekend, but then again you went to bed pretty early too—and proceed to spend the next few hours rewatching Mew Mew Kissy Cutie, because you want to be able to keep up with Alphys the next time you talk about it with her.

Just before noon, your mom walks upstairs to remind you that you have that babysitting thing at noon, and shouldn’t you be getting ready? The next few minutes are a flurry of activity as you try to make yourself at least vaguely presentable and run over to the neighbor’s house. 

You’re met by their mom, who’s going out to lunch with friends or something, and who seems equally in a hurry. She tells you to cook them something and keep them busy, then flies out the door. 

You’re left with three kids. Two of them look to be identical twins, and one is…another goat monster? You’ve never met so many goat monsters in such a short amount of time. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, you hastily correct yourself mentally. Just a weird coincidence. 

One of the twins immediately introduces themselves, via tablet, as Frisk. “I’m nine,” they inform you importantly. Then, they look back at the two others, who are holding hands. The other twin is frowning, but the goat monster looks sort of like he’s doing his best to keep from crying.

Frisk sighs petulantly and types, “And my siblings over there are Chara and Asriel. Sorry, they’re sort of…shy.”

“That’s all right,” you assure them. “I’m sort of shy too.”

“Then why are you a babysitter?” Chara finally speaks up.

You wince. “Well…”

“Tell the truth.”

“Because my mom asked me to,” you admit under Chara’s intense gaze. “But I’ve done this before, honest. And I’m a pretty good cook, I’m taking a class right now and everything.”

Chara looks unimpressed, but Frisk pats you on the leg sympathetically before pulling you to the kitchen. Chara and Asriel follow at a distance.

“So, what do you guys want for lunch?” you ask, trying to save face.

“Something spicy,” Chara requests. “Super spicy.” Then they grin at Asriel, whose eyes are starting to water.

Frisk shakes their head emphatically and types, “No. Asriel hates spicy food.”

Chara scowls and shoves Frisk. You half expect Frisk to shove back, but they just stand there, resigned. 

“Hey, no shoving,” you reprimand. “Asriel, what do you like?”

“…Macaroni and cheese?”

“Sounds good to me.” You start prepping for the recipe you know by heart, before whipping around to the kids and waggling your finger. “No naughty business while I’m cooking, all right? How about you put on some TV or something?”

Chara just smiles, but Frisk nods and heads over to the television, tugging Asriel along by his hand. 

After you finish making their food, Chara seems placated, more or less. You bring out the paper and crayons, which Asriel seems happy about. He draws this rainbow goat thing with wings and lasers and excitedly explains that it’s his ‘original character’, the ‘God of Hyperdeath’. You ooh and ahh in the appropriate places until he’s beaming. Frisk draws flowers and stuff, while Chara draws surprisingly detailed…goat skulls. You’re really not sure how to feel about that. They display it before Asriel with a grin, who starts crying, and Frisk frowns and slaps Chara on the hand. 

You have a short talk with them about the importance of being nice to your siblings while Chara yawns and Asriel calms down, then you all watch a movie. It’s pretty calm after that, because Asriel falls asleep and Chara and Frisk both go upstairs to do their homework at your request. That said, you’re still relieved when their mom gets home several hours later.

“Will you come back again?” asks Frisk, tugging on your shirt.

“Uh…yeah, sure,” you say on your way out the door.

As the door closes, you swear you hear them shout, “Bring Sans next time.” But surely not, right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SORRY FOR THE DELETE AND REUPLOAD THE CHAPTER WAS BEING A BUTT BC OF A THUMBS UP anyway
> 
> featuring chara as The Brat, asriel as The Crybaby, and frisk as That Kid Who Knows Too Much But Is Sweet I Guess
> 
> writing three kids at once is hard ;v;
> 
> timeskip next chapter!


	13. Day 3: Period 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> food ment

The weeks fall into a comfortable rhythm, and before you know it, it’s the middle of November. 

You’re at the group’s spot at the pavilion, trying to get Sans to eat his lunch. It’s a daily struggle. Every day you make more food than you need and give him some, every day he pretends like he’s not hungry until you threaten to feed him, every day he finally acquiesces and eats more than his share. Luckily everybody stopped ‘aww’-ing a few weeks ago, but you can still see it in their amused expressions. 

“Sans, seriously, eat or I’ll—I’ll throw this food in your face, I swear I will.”

“i’m seriously fine!”

“Are you trying to get me to feed you? Is that it?” you demand, and he blanches.

“no, i’m just—agh, fine!” You pat yourself on the back as he takes a huge spoonful of your second cup of yogurt.

“Dear, why don’t you love me like that?” asks Toriel rhetorically. Asgore just smiles and pulls her into him.

To his credit, Sans has stopped wincing when they refer to each other by pet names. Instead, he nudges you in the side and whispers, “sweetcheeks.”

“Snookums.”

“pudding.”

“Munchkin.”

“hot stuff.”

“Gangsta baby.”

“wait, what?”

You shrug. “I don’t know either, but it was on the list of pet names that I Googled.”

He gasps in mock offense. “cheater!”

“That name was not on the list. Also, rude.”

“here i am, putting my heart and SOUL into coming up with these names for you—“

You snort. “Please. I saw you on ’25 Worst Pet-Names for Your Lover’ the other day.”

“that’s what came up when i searched for ‘pet names for annoying datefriend’,” he says lightly.

“And yet you still haven’t called me Lovey Yummers yet.”

“i was saving it for a special occasion.”

Undyne groans. “Guys, seriously, stop. You’re making me nauseous.”

“You’d be the same way if you had a girlfriend,” you shoot back, winking at Alphys when Undyne blinks. 

Alphys colors and glares at you. You just smile placidly at her as Undyne protests, “No I wouldn’t! I’d be the best girlfriend ever.”

“oh, i’m sure. you should test that theory out, though. just to make sure, you know?” This time it’s Sans winking at Undyne, who stands up abruptly. 

“I’m leaving.”

“aw, come on—“

“No, seriously. I’ll come back when you guys are ready to stop being jerks.” She stomps away, and Alphys bites her lip and looks around before getting up and running after her.

“they’re totally gonna kiss.”

“Sans,” says Toriel reproachfully. “We all know they’re into each other, but we also all know they hate being teased about it. Can’t you be a little more considerate?”

Sans flushes blue and looks away.

You see his expression and come to his defense. “Hey, he just wants them to be happy. We all do.” You put a light, reassuring hand on his shoulder. 

“I suppose,” says Toriel, but she’s still frowning, and Sans still won’t meet her eye.

You squirm under the uncomfortable atmosphere and let out a huge, relieved sigh when the bell rings.

“Wow, okay! Sans, let’s go.” You prod him in the shoulder to get him going. “I hear today we get a condom demonstration.” You wiggle your eyebrows at him, but he’s obviously still down. 

Once you two are far enough away from the table, far enough that Toriel won’t hear you, you pat him on the back. “Hey, get over it, okay? She’s just being Toriel.”

“what is that supposed to mean?” he snaps. You draw back, hurt.

“Whoa, hey, it doesn’t mean anything, all right? Toriel is just really considerate of other people’s feelings—“

“what, and i’m not?”

“I didn’t say that! You guys just deal with things differently—“

“and my way is worse, huh?”

“What? No! Look, I’m on your side here!”

“are you?”

“Of course I am!” You throw your hands up in the air exasperatedly. “Fine, if you’re going to be like this, I don’t have to deal with it.” 

“wait—what—“

“Nope. Goodbye, Sans.” Then you stomp off yourself in the direction of the Health classroom.

When he reaches the classroom, you are very pointedly looking at the board, seated on the opposite side of the classroom from where you and Sans and Undyne usually sit. Undyne is also missing, so he sits on his normal right side of the classroom, feeling very lonely and very pissed off. Part of him knows he’s being ridiculous, but the other part of him still doesn’t know how to deal with Toriel reprimanding him and with you abandoning him and—oh, jeez, with Mr. Staehl awkwardly positioning a condom above a zucchini. Actually all of him doesn’t know how to deal with that. 

He peeks over at you. You have an absolutely glorious look on your face, sort of a mix between disgust and abject horror. He sighs and looks back at the display up front. 

Everybody floods out of the classroom as soon as the bell rings, and since you’re on the left side of the room closest to the door, he can’t catch up with you without running, and he’s certainly not going to run for you again. Fine. He doesn’t care anyway.

He sees you sitting next to Alphys in the Science classroom. Alphys is explaining something to you excitedly, and all traces of your bad mood are gone as you squeal and hug her. 

(And yeah, maybe he does care just a little bit that _you_ don’t seem to care about the fight anymore.)

He must be giving off a vibe, because nobody sits next to him to partner with him. He is left alone again. The class is even more boring than usual without your whispered commentary and muffled giggles as he makes chemistry puns. He hadn’t realized he’d become so accustomed to you. 

The class ends, and you are again out the door before he can even call out to you. He scowls as he realizes this fight means he’ll have to walk to Papyrus’ school for the first time in a month. 

Okay, so maybe he was being a bit petty. Maybe he was overreacting and took it out on you. But that doesn’t give you the right to just up and abandon him like this!

Or…well, does it? Because, he realizes with a mounting terror, maybe you don’t need him anymore. Your grades in Science have been improving, and you have your own friends now—well, you have the same friends, but still—and, crap, it was always him that needed this fake relationship, wasn’t it. You sure didn’t get anything out of it. 

He may have just messed up colossally.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *singing* 5 chapters in one day  
> lying in the depths of ao3--
> 
> no seriously i wrote 5 chapters in one day guys omg im so happy with myself
> 
> the next chapter is already written, btw, but i'm gonna put it up later today k
> 
> also that is the second result that comes up when you search 'pet names for annoying datefriend' js


	14. Day 3: Period 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> food ment again, for the record lol

“YOU MESSED UP COLOSSALLY, YES,” acknowledges his brother. 

Sans groans. “isn’t there a nicer way of putting that?”

“WASN’T THERE A NICER WAY OF PUTTING…LIKE, EVERYTHING YOU SAID TO YOUR FAKE DATEFRIEND TODAY?”

“…probably, yeah.”

“I LIKED THEM,” Papyrus laments. “IT’S TOO BAD.”

“whoa, whoa, whoa! okay, why past tense?”

“WHAT, WERE YOU PLANNING ON APOLOGIZING?”

Sans kicks a rock that’s in his way and mutters, “i was sort of hoping…they would apologize first, maybe?”

Papyrus squints at him, then repeats, “I LIKED THEM. IT’S TOO BAD.”

“fine, okay, i’ll apologize, jeez!”

“GOOD. WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO CONSULT MY DATING BOOKS FOR ADVICE?”

“i thought i confiscated that thing?”

“LIKE I SAID, I HAVE SEVERAL.”

“ugh. no, you don’t need to consult them. i know how to say i’m sorry.”

“WELL, IF YOU SAY SO. BUT THERE’S NO SHAME IN ASKING FOR HELP, YOU KNOW.”

“yeah, yeah.”

For all his bravado, though, Sans finds himself staring at his phone with your most recent text conversation open, unable to think of the right words to say. Would a simple ‘i’m sorry’ be fine, or does he need to come up with something more elaborate? Does he need to explain himself, or will you understand? He likes to think you understand him pretty well, but this did also come sort of out of nowhere…

Papyrus comes to his mind, but he shakes his head emphatically at the idea. No. He will not be going to his little brother for fake dating advice.

Finally, he decides to just wing it and texts you a simple, ‘hey’

His probably nonexistent stomach drops inside him as you immediately read, then don’t respond.

Five minutes.

Ten minutes.

An hour, then two.

Crap, you’re really mad.

\----------

You are really mad. ‘Hey’, seriously? You had been thinking you might have been too harsh on him, but ‘hey’? No apology or anything? You scowl at the phone, then click it shut and place it on your nightstand. You’re going to bed. He can wait.

The next day, you contemplate not going to the group’s lunch spot, but you do want to congratulate Alphys and Undyne. Alphys had told you as soon as you sat down next to her in Science yesterday that after she had run after Undyne, the two had talked and then confessed their feelings and then kissed, and now they were together. You are happy for them, really you are, but you still almost turn foot as soon as you see Sans sitting at his normal place at the table. He raises his hand in an aborted wave, then seems to think better of it and puts his hand quietly back down by his side.

You sit as far away from him on the bench as possible, ignoring his visible wince, and do what you came here to do. “Alphys, Undyne, hey! Congratulations. I’m so happy you two are finally together.”

This gets Sans’ attention. “wait, what?”

“Turns out I was wrong to get angry at you two for your…unconventional methods yesterday,” says Toriel apologetically. “It did actually get them together, so we all actually owe you our thanks.”

Oh, crap. He feels like a real douche now that Toriel isn’t even mad at him anymore. He folds in on himself as you raise an eyebrow at him pointedly, then return your attention to Undyne and Alphys. The new couple is watching with grimaces, while Toriel and Asgore both have frozen smiles plastered on their faces.

“Are you two, uh…okay there?” asks Undyne nervously.

Part of you feels bad about ruining their first lunch together as a couple, but most of you is just pissed. “Oh, we’re aces,” you respond sweetly. “He sent me the nicest text last night, can you imagine?”

“um, hey—“

“Whoa, yeah, there it is! ‘Hey’. Sans, have I ever told you what a bastion of eloquence you are?”

“look—“

You continue on glibly, “It’s almost like someone is talking, which is strange, because all I can hear is ‘hey’—“

“okay, i get it! i—“

“You know what, if I focus, I can also hear—just faintly—someone blowing up at me for no reason at all—“

“i’m sorry!”

You shut up in favor of glaring at him.

“i’m sorry, i was a huge jerk and you didn’t deserve it and i feel really bad about it, okay? look, you—you’ve only been gone for one day and i already miss you. you’re, like…one of my best friends, all right?” He shoves his hands in his pockets and looks away, blushing. 

He doesn’t see Toriel’s face drop at that statement.

You’re silent a few moments, lips pursed, before you sigh. “Okay. You could’ve led with that, you know?”

He turns to look you in the eye hopefully. “wait, does that mean—“

“Yeah, we’re cool.” You pause for a moment, before a big, beautiful smile spreads across your face. “But only because I’m the nicest person in the world, yeah?”

In that moment, he can’t help but hug you. You feel surprisingly nice against him, he thinks as he squeezes you tight. 

Then, he realizes what he’s doing and releases you, coughing awkwardly. “right. well, that just happened. …in front of everybody, no less.”

“Aw, are you embarrassed?” you tease. “Pumpkin?”

“I am,” says Undyne with a disgusted look on her face. “Can we get back to Alphys and me?”

“Oh, yeah, sorry!” You smile apologetically. “Please, by all means, start making out.”

Alphys lets out a squeak as she colors, and you laugh, reaching across the table to pat her hand. “Just kidding.”

“I never back away from a challenge,” Undyne says dangerously, that same predatory grin from before on her face. “Alphys?”

“U-u-uhh, yes?”

Undyne flushes a dark red—well, purple, against her skin—and presses her lips to Alphys’ cheek quickly. “There.”

As everybody laughs, and as you pull out a sandwich and shove it in Sans’ face, everything feels almost back to normal.

Nobody notices Toriel’s frown or the contemplative way that she pokes at her lunch.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> undyne is the sort of person who talks a big game but is actually a huge nerd
> 
> this is the 5th chapter i wrote, so im all caught up postingwise now jsyk


	15. Day 3: Period 3

Near the end of the lunch period, Undyne pauses from her loud chewing to say, “Oh, yeah. Alphys and I were thinking. Sans, ______, since you were sorta the ones who got us off our butts, we should go on a double date sometime. You know, as thanks or whatever.”

“A date?”

“Yeah?” Undyne snorts. “What, do you and Sans not go on dates?”

You laugh an unnaturally high-pitched laugh. “Hah, of course we go on dates!”

“all the time, actually.”

“Barely have time to do anything else, we date so much.” 

“yep. just like, a ridiculous amount of dating.”

The ensuing silence is somewhat awkward. Finally, Asgore asks politely, “What did you do last time you went out? Tori and I are always looking for new ideas.”

You and Sans exchange a bewildered look. “Ummm…” What did people even do on dates? You’ve never been on one, so you wouldn’t know. 

Trying to be helpful, Sans offers, “fencing?”

You turn to glare at him. He looks slightly ashamed. “That’s right. We went…fencing.”

“Oh.” Asgore smiles bemusedly. “How…unique.”

“Yep.” Ugh. Sans.

“We were sort of thinking more like…bowling?” says Alphys timidly. 

“Bowling!” Thank goodness for Alphys.

“bowling is good.”

“Great. So, tomorrow?” Undyne has finished eating and is wiping her mouth.

“sounds good to me.”

“Yeah, um, sure.” You never do anything on Saturdays anyway.

“Cool.” Undyne raises her hand for a high five, which Sans returns weakly. 

Attention now off you, you send a quick text to Sans under the table.

“fencing? seriously?”

“i panicked”

“but. Fencing”

“yeah no you’re right that’s pretty bad”

Sans pauses, then texts, “it sounds kinda like a euphemism actually”

“FRICKIN HECK SANS”

“hey baby wanna fence ;)”

“SHUT UR HECK UP”

He looks up from his phone to see you smiling despite your feigned textual anger. Score. He grins and returns to his phone to send off some fence puns until you’re giggling uncontrollably and Undyne is rolling her eyes.

When the bell rings, you all split ways to walk to your separate classes, except for Sans and Toriel, who walk together to their shared class. 

Toriel is uncharacteristically silent through all of Magic Practice. Sans tries to engage her in knock-knock jokes, but she responds unenthusiastically or not at all. He frowns as he thinks through what could have brought on her behavior. Was it watching you and him fight, or something? Toriel had seemed normal the day before, after all…

However, he doesn’t get an answer to his questions until later, when they have their traditional Friday night Skype call. A few minutes in to the call, he gets a text from you and lets out a bark of a laugh.

“What’s funny?” inquires Toriel.

“oh, just…” It’s a fencing joke, but he can’t really explain that to Toriel without explaining that they had lied about the date. “______ sent me something funny, is all.”

Toriel is silent for several moments, and after a while, Sans asks, “Toriel?”

“Did you mean what you said today?”

“huh? what did i say?”

“About ______ being one of your best friends.”

He frowns. “well, yeah.”

She sighs. “This is silly of me.”

“what is?”

“I confess…that that makes me feel kind of lonely.”

“why?”

“It’s nothing. I shouldn’t have said anything, I’m sorry—“

“no, no, i want to hear. what’s wrong?”

“It’s just…” She laughs self-deprecatingly. “I’m rather used to being your only best friend, is all.” 

Oh. 

“Like I said, silly, right?”

He doesn’t know how to respond. Toriel, I don’t think of you as my best friend because I’m in love with you? Obviously he can’t say that.

“um…” He scratches his head. “Tori, even if i have another best friend, you’re still really special to me, you know?”

“Yeah, I know. You too.” She hesitates, then adds quietly, “Thanks, Sans. You always know how to make me feel better.”

“yeah, no problem, Tori.”

\----------

The next day comes, and with it, the scheduled double date.

You check your phone for the time once more and call out, “Hey, Mom, I’m leaving, all right?”

She calls back, “Where are you going?”

“Bowling with my friends.” That’s mostly true, isn’t it?

“Oh. Well, have fun, then!”

“Thanks!” You jog outside to your car and input the GPS information into your phone. Mt. Ebott Bowling Supercenter. 

The building itself is a rather drab, uninspiring thing, like most bowling alleys. Walking in, you almost immediately spot Undyne and Alphys and wave at them. They wave back, but they look slightly confused.

When you reach them, they ask, “Where’s Sans?” 

You check your phone quickly. “I don’t know. Presumably coming, or he’d have said something.”

“You didn’t come together?” Alphys asks curiously, still struggling to tie her shoes.

“Were..we supposed to?”

Alphys and Undyne exchange a look, but Alphys eventually finishes her shoes and smiles wanly at you. “No, I guess not.”

Sans arrives about five minutes later. Apparently he had asked his dad to drop him off, but would need a ride back home. You volunteer, of course; you’ve gotten quite used to driving him around by now. 

“Sorry, I should have just picked you up in the first place,” you apologize.

“nah, my dad was happy to do it. said something about it being a miracle that i was getting out and doing something for once.”

Undyne and Alphys exchange another look at this.

You start bowling soon thereafter. You’re awful at bowling, but you’re having fun anyway. Alphys and Undyne are being unbearably cute, holding hands whenever they’re not up to bat and snuggling against each other. 

“Look at you two,” you coo when you all decide to take a break. “You’re adorable.”

Undyne raises an eyebrow. “And you two are surprisingly not.”

“what? what do you mean—“

“You haven’t touched each other once while we’ve been here.”

Sans glances at you worriedly. “sure we have—“

“N-no, actually, you haven’t,” pipes up Alphys. “I’ve been watching.”

You frown at your clenched fists in your lap. You really hope this isn’t going where you think it’s going.

Undyne continues, “In fact, if you take away the pet names and your whole feeding each other schtick, you guys don’t act much like a couple at all.”

“would you prefer we make a big deal out of it?” asks Sans nervously. 

“That’s not the point, Sans,” says Alphys, sounding dejected. “The point is…”

Undyne interrupts angrily, “The point is you guys aren’t really dating, are you?”

Oh.

Crap.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ruh-roh


	16. Day 3: Period 4

“Wh-what are you talking abo—“

“Stop lying!” roars Undyne. The other patrons at the bowling alley look at your little group curiously, and she flushes and quiets down. “We already know.”

“I’ve sort of suspected for a while,” Alphys mumbles. 

“But the clues are all there. You don’t show up together, Sans apparently never goes out, which means you two don’t actually go on dates—“

“and we don’t touch each other, yeah.” Sans sighs quietly and buries his head in his hands. “crap.”

“Why?” Undyne hisses. “Why would you lie to all of us about something like this? And _______. Our whole relationship is based around a lie. Why—“

“I’m…sure they have a good reason…” Alphys says hesitantly, like she’s trying to convince herself.

You clench your fists even harder, trying to keep the tears from coming. Sans looks equally unhappy.

“Well?” demands Undyne.

Toriel. Toriel can’t know. That’s the only thought running through your mind. Sans doesn’t want Toriel to know.

“It’s…it’s my fault?” you suggest miserably, and cringe at the look Undyne gives you. “I, um—“

Sans stops you with a hand on your fist. “no, _______. it’s ok. they deserve to know.”

“But—“

“it’s fine. but thank you.” He squares himself up and explains in a small voice, “it’s because i’m in love with Toriel.”

Undyne narrows her eyes. “I don’t follow.”

“she got together with Asgore, and i got super jealous, and when Toriel suggested that i was dating _______, i went along with it because i was hoping she would get jealous too. but that didn’t happen, obviously, so…anyway, don’t blame _______ for any of this. it’s not their fault. i dragged them into it and begged them not to tell.”

“No, I’m guilty too. I agreed to it,” you say stubbornly. 

“but i totally guilt tripped you into that—“

“It was still my decision in the end—“

“Stop. Stop!” You stop bickering to see Alphys breathing hard, obviously seconds from crying. “So you lied to us all b-because of a…a crush?”

“well…basically.”

“And you.” She rounds on you and you shrink back. “Was any of this ever real? Was this just a game to you?”

“Alphys, no!” you protest, tears beading at the corner of your eyes. “I…I lied to you about this. But never about anything else. You guys are my best friends. My only friends.” You bite your lip as the tears start to flow. “I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, well, apology not accepted,” snaps Undyne. “Alphys, let’s go.”

Alphys is crying too, now, but she nods and gets up to leave.

“w-wait.”

“What?” Undyne barks.

“are you…going to tell Toriel?”

If Undyne looked mad before, she looks downright furious now. “I don’t know,” she hisses. “And I hate you for putting me in that position.” Then she storms off, Alphys in hand.

You start sobbing brokenly, breaking Sans out of his reverie. “oh. crap. no, don’t cry—“ Awkwardly, he pulls you into him. His sweatshirt is getting wet, but that’s not really his priority right now. “i really don’t know how to deal with crying—“

You take a few shuddering breaths, trying to calm yourself down. Eventually, you get yourself to the point where you just feel numb.

“They hate me now,” you mumble into Sans’ sweatshirt.

“well, if it makes you feel any better, they probably hate me more,” he offers, but his voice too is monotone as he rubs your back soothingly. 

“That does not make me feel better, but thank you for trying.”

“worth a shot.”

A thought occurs to you, and you start laughing. 

“what?”

“Best first date ever, huh?”

Soon, both of you are laughing wildly, sagging against each other.

(The other patrons have given up on trying to understand what’s going on by this point.)

\----------

You drive Sans home in relative silence and drop him off with a wry grin and a wave. 

“Who was it that drove you home?” inquires Gaster lightly.

“oh, it was _______.”

“You two have gotten closer,” Gaster observes.

“heh. yeah, i guess.”

“Do you like them?”

“Dad!”

“What? I’m just asking.”

“no, okay? jeez.” After that he stomps upstairs, but the question sticks in his mind for some reason.

Oddly enough, despite the fact that he’s been fake dating you for a month now, it’s never even occurred to him to think of you as a romantic prospect. Too focused on Toriel, he supposes. Isn’t that just the way.

But…it wouldn’t be terrible, he thinks with a yawn as he readies himself for sleep that night. You and him. Not that it will ever happen, though.

On Monday, both of you decide to meet up in that same corner where you had originally had lunch for the first time together. You get the impression that you wouldn’t be welcome. But, around ten minutes into the lunch period, Toriel rounds the corner, panting.

“There you guys are! What’s the matter?”

You and Sans look at each other. “Um…”

“you…Undyne didn’t…?”

“She said that the double date didn’t go so well, but an awkward outing with friends is no reason to stay away, silly,” Toriel chides. “Come on, come back with me.”

When you hesitate, Toriel threatens to drag you both there by the ears. “i don’t have any ears,” protests Sans, but Toriel gives him a sharp look and he shuts up.

You end up following behind her penitently, like two kicked dogs. When you reach the table, Undyne’s lips curl up in a snarl, but she doesn’t say anything. Alphys looks away from you the whole time. Toriel and Asgore observe the situation, but also stay silent. And you and Sans certainly aren’t talking. All in all, it is very quiet, and very awkward.

The bell seems to take an eternity to ring, but eventually it does, and everybody rises from the table at the same time.

Toriel and Asgore are the first to leave, Toriel citing a need to get to class early that day to set up for ‘something’, and Asgore citing that he ‘just had to go’ and running off, leaving you and Sans with Alphys and Undyne.

“so…” Sans clears his throat. “you, uh, you didn’t tell.”

“No, I didn’t,” says Undyne, frowning. “I want to. But I can’t. It would break Toriel’s heart.” She turns sharply on her heel to head towards the gym and calls out over her shoulder, “But don’t think this means I’m okay with this.”

“wouldn’t dream of it,” says Sans weakly. Alphys looks at you, then trods off also.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i am on an updating roll dang
> 
> (meanwhile, ymadg languishes in a corner...) 
> 
> next chapter: the gang plays kickball, sans discovers something new, and alphys and undyne continue to struggle with the concept of forgiveness


	17. Day 3: Period 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cw ableist language

Today’s team sport is kickball, which you hate second only to dodgeball. Sans has long since explained the condition of his non-failure in P.E. to you, which means you and Sans have to actually participate. You’re both in the outfield, of course—nobody wants the two worst people in positions of actual power anyway—but still. 

Surprisingly, you both manage to get through a game without any problems. You’re allowed to stand on the sidelines while they rotate in another group of players. You talk quietly to Sans while waiting, when—

“LOOK OUT!” bellows somebody in the field, and you look up, and the ball is coming right for you, and Sans takes your hand and—

Suddenly, you’re not there anymore. You’re a few feet away, watching the ball bounce uselessly off the fence.

“Whoa,” you and Sans say in unison.

“I didn’t know you could teleport,” you comment, awed.

“neither did i,” he says, looking at his hands. The game continues on with the imminent risk of another bloody nose gone, but you are both focused on the teleportation now.

“Have you ever done that before?”

“no. i would’ve remembered something that cool. plus, i would never walk again.”

You laugh. “You would be the first to think of that. But doesn’t using magic require energy? I don’t know all that much about it, but—“

“yeah, it does,” Sans confirms. “it makes you super tired.”

“So you’d get just as tired as if you walked normally, if not more.”

“okay, okay. don’t ruin this for me.”

“Sorry.” You bump against his shoulder with your own. “And hey. Thanks for saving me back there.”

“no problem.”

The class finishes without further incident, except for Mr. Staehl stopping you and Sans on the way out.

“Don’t think I didn’t notice that little stunt you pulled back there,” he says gruffly. 

Sans starts to protest, but Mr. Staehl holds up his hands. “No, no, I’m not angry. But you’re in Magic Practice, right? Be sure to report that to the teacher. And don’t try it again without training. It can be dangerous.”

“yes, sir.”

You both start off again, getting about halfway to the Science classroom before Sans whispers wickedly, “i’m gonna do it again.”

“Sans, no! He said it was dangerous.”

“Sans yes,” sniffs Sans. “you don’t have to come with me if you don’t want.”

You sigh, aggravated. “Well I’m not going to let you do it alone, either.”

He offers his hand to you, and you take it with a roll of your eyes. Your hands are warm, he notes. It feels nice.

Then, he concentrates very hard, and—

The next second, you and Sans are in a dark, close space, shoved up against one another.

“Sans,” you say sweetly. “Can you explain to me where we are right now?”

“um…” He sticks a hand out to his side and nearly knocks something with a long handle over. “my guess is janitor’s closet?”

“I see. Can you explain to me why we are in a janitor’s closet?”

“nnnnno.”

You reach around for a doorknob and find it, but…

“It’s locked.”

“oh.”

“Oh?” you hiss. “We’re locked in a janitor’s closet, missing Science, and all you have to say for yourself is ‘oh’? I told you this was a bad idea!”

“and i told you you didn’t have to come!”

Your breath is hot on his face. “I’m not just going to abandon you, Sans! If you’re going to be an idiot, I’m going to be right there with you! Haven’t we gone through enough together for you to know that?”

“…oh.” He’s glad there’s no light, because you can’t see him blush. 

You exhale against him, then shift. Then shift again.

“stop wiggling,” he says, embarrassed.

“I’m extremely uncomfortable!”

“you’re about to get even more uncomfortable if you don’t stop wiggling!”

“What—Sans!”

“it’s not my fault!”

Just then, the doorknob jiggles and turns. The door swings open.

The janitor, an old turtle monster, blinks slowly, then drawls, “Should I leave you two alone?”

“No!”

“please let us out.”

“By all means.” He pushes the door open wider and gestures. 

You eagerly squeeze out of the door, Sans following behind you. “Thank you so much,” you say sincerely to the janitor. “I thought we would die in there.”

“Well, I reckon you shouldn’t have gone in in the first place, then,” he says dryly.

You glare at Sans. “Trust me, it was unintentional.”

“never again, sir.”

“All right. Well…don’t you two have someplace else to be?”

“Science,” realizes Sans in horror. 

You take off for the classroom, which is thankfully nearby. Only about five minutes have elapsed since the beginning of class, but you still stick out like a sore thumb when you and Sans arrive at the doorway, panting, flushed, and disheveled.

Dr. Gaster looks at you, then Sans, levelly. “Please, come in.”

“Sorry,” you gasp. “It’s his fault.”

“______!” Sans yelps.

“I’m sure,” says Dr. Gaster coolly, “but you’re interrupting class right now, so if you wouldn’t mind taking a seat…?”

You and Sans abashedly take your seats. You peek to the back of the classroom to see Alphys sitting alone, deep in thought.

You feel terrible about lying to her. Undyne, too, but especially Alphys. You two have become quite good friends over the past month, talking nearly every day until the early hours of the morning. You don’t know how you’ll deal if she never talks to you again.

To your surprise, you don’t have to find out. When you get home from driving Papyrus and Sans, you have a message waiting on your computer.

ALPHYS 3:30 PM  
hey

_______ 3:45 PM  
whoa, um…hey?

ALPHYS 3:46 PM  
i’m still mad at you

________ 3:46 PM  
oh. okay

ALPHYS 3:48 PM  
but i also believe you when you say you didn’t mean to hurt us. and…you’re my friend too

________ 3:48 PM  
i really really didnt. i honestly wasnt even thinking? i really am so sorry

ALPHYS 3:49 PM  
yeah

ALPHYS 3:49 PM  
Undyne will take longer to come around though

ALPHYS 3:49 PM  
please don’t be mad at her

________ 3:50 PM  
of course im not mad at her? im mad at myself

________ 3:51 PM  
for letting myself go along with it, and for hurting you guys

________ 3:51 PM  
but. im also. sorta glad? bc even if it was bad, i got to meet you guys

ALPHYS 3:53 PM  
hm. i guess

ALPHYS 3:53 PM  
but btw are you sure you and sans aren’t a couple

________ 3:53 PM  
pretty sure lol

ALPHYS 3:54 PM  
because you two are cute together even if you’re awkward about it js

ALPHYS 3:54 PM  
and also when you got to Science today you looked like you had been making out lol

________ 3:55 PM  
OH NO

_________ 3:55 PM  
IS THAT. WHAT IT LOOKED LIKE

ALPHYS 3:55 PM  
kinda yeah lol

_________ 3:55 PM  
IM GONNA KILL HIM

ALPHYS 3:56 PM  
lol

ALPHYS 4:00 PM  
you’re joking right

ALPHYS 4:10 PM  
________? you’re joking right

ALPHYS  
Just now

RIP Sans

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StrongFish91 ??????

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StrongFish91 I mean I don’t care but ???????

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ALPHYS message me k

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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> how obvious is it i know and care crap-all about kickball other than that it is yet another sport that i have been hit in the face during
> 
> (multiple times, ill have u kno)


	18. Day 3: Period 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> food ment

Meanwhile, Sans is dealing with the consequences of his sins. 

“So, you and _______,” Gaster says thoughtfully when he arrives home for the evening.

Sans struggles to keep his tone even. “what about them?”

“Sans, I think you know what I mean.”

“nope.”

“You two are…romantically involved, are you not?”

Crap! “uhhhhh…”

“Even if you don’t admit it, I can tell,” says Gaster reproachfully. “You lied to me, Sans.”

“huh? how?”

“You said you didn’t like them.”

Oh, jeez. Gaster has always been able to tell when Sans is lying. He has to be careful with this one. “i wouldn’t talk about something like that with you.” There. That’s a true statement, even if it’s misleading.

Gaster looks away and sighs. “I had hoped…well. Never mind.” He starts out the room.

That’s it? “you’re not mad?”

“Why would I be?”

“i thought you would say, like…that i can’t afford any distractions at this point in the game, or something. you know, like, keep your eyes on the prize.”

“Is _______ a distraction?”

“no!”

“Then I don’t see why I should be worried.” Gaster pauses, tilting his head in thought. “I would like to meet them sometime, though. In a less official capacity, I mean.”

You’re going to kill him. “i’ll, uh. i’ll ask.”

“All right. And Sans?”

“yeah?”

“Try not to let your other…activities…interfere with class in the future.” With that, he winks (?!) and leaves.

Half-dazed, Sans lies back on his bed. Had his dad just given him his blessing for his fake relationship? How had he even found out?

He takes out his phone and bemusedly texts you, “you’ve been dad-approved”

A few moments later, he gets a response back. “WHAT YOU TOLD HIM”

“no he found out! idek how i swear!”

“…alphys was right”

“?”

“said when we got to science it looked like we had been uh. fencing”

“fenc—oH NO”

“NO FRICKING KIDDING”

“SUDDENLY EVERYTHING MAKES SENSE AND ITS TERRIBLE”

“HOW DO U THINK I FEEL??!!!”

“PROBABLY PRETTY GREAT BC YOUVE FINALLY IMAGINARY CLAIMED MY POOR VIRGIN LIPS”

“U DONT EVEN HAVE LIPS!!!”

“um first of all, how dare,”

“seriously how do u kiss anyway”

“wanna find out ;)”

“doki doki. jk go kiss your toriel dakimakura or something”

“ha ha”

“ur not denying it tho”

“;)”

\-----------

At dinner that night, you can’t stop thinking about Sans and how everybody in your Science class thinks you’re kissing him. You suppose it’s silly. If you’ve been dating for longer than a month, it’s not that much of a stretch that you might have made out with him at some point despite his pronounced lack of lips. But there’s something about the implication that makes you particularly embarrassed.

You poke around at your food, apparently enough so that your mom notices.

“Are you all right?”

“Huh? Yeah. When is the husband coming home?”

“In about thirty minutes, and that wasn’t really an answer. What’s going on?”

“Um…” You sigh. “Hypothetically, what if somebody thought something about you that wasn’t true, but you couldn’t correct them about it?”

“Something bad?”

You consider. “I don’t know. Something weird.”

“Hmm. Well, it doesn’t really matter what other people think as long as you know the truth, right?”

Rolling your eyes, you reply, “Maybe ideally, but in the real world it does sort of matter what people think of you.” Pausing, you add, “And what their dads think of you. Hypothetically.”

“This sounds suspiciously like it might be a real situation. If I knew more details, I might be able to help more.”

You don’t want to lie and say it’s not real, and you definitely don’t want to explain the actual circumstances, so you say, “Never mind.”

“You sure?” She looks into your eyes searchingly.

“Yep.”

“If you say so.”

“And I do.”

“Okay, I get it. New topic of conversation. Has your dad talked to you recently?”

You narrow your eyes. “Why would he?”

“He mentioned to me about a week ago that he wanted to fly you over for a visit at some point. I thought he was going to discuss it with you.”

You sag against the table and moan, “Mom! I don’t want to visit him!”

“Be nice. He is your father.”

“Genetically,” you grumble. 

“And you did promise him as a condition of us moving out here that you’d visit.”

“I didn’t think he’d actually make me do it!”

“It was still a promise, though. I know how much you hate breaking promises, _______.” She levels you with a stern look.

She’s right, but you don’t want to admit it. You look away stormily. 

“Just think about it. You don’t have to make a decision anytime soon.”

“Fine, okay. I’ll think about it.”

“Thank you.” 

You both return to eating, you now angrily stabbing your noodles at the thought of your dad. They had gotten divorced years ago, when you were pretty young. At first, you visited him every other weekend as per the divorce agreement, but eventually he stopped caring more and more until you saw him more like twice every year. Sometimes he’d message you on Headspace, and even more rarely he would call. But most of the time it seemed like he didn’t really remember he was a father at all. 

You did not need the stress of dealing with him on top of the situation with Undyne and Alphys. Or your grades, you think morosely. You had finally looked at them after a long period of nervous avoidance and discovered that the few that were not mediocre were horrendous. One of the classes that fell into the latter category was Science, despite Sans’ tutelage. 

Honestly, you’re beginning to feel a bit hopeless. About a lot of things. About your friends, and about school, and about your future. It probably doesn’t help that you haven’t been to therapy since you moved, or that you had ran out of refills on your medicine two weeks ago and never bothered to ask for new ones. 

Your mom doesn’t know about this, and you certainly aren’t going to tell her. You don’t want her, or anyone, to worry about you. And anyway, you’ve been through this before, right? You’ll be fine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry if you have great dads or not-so-great moms lol. this fic, much more so than anything in undertale.igf, is semi-autobiographical. minus, of course, the skeletons and the fake dating


	19. Day 4: Period 1

You are not fine.

It’s three weeks later—almost winter break—and nothing has improved. If anything, it’s gotten worse. Undyne barely speaks to you—Alphys says that she refuses to talk to her about the issue, either—and it’s becoming clear that you’ll fail Science unless you pull off some kind of miracle on the final. Graduation seems so far away. And who’s to say that things will get better when you graduate, anyway? What if things are always this way?

You try not to let anything show when you’re at school or with your mom. They don’t need the burden of worrying about you, and you don’t deserve to be worried about anyway. And you’re doing a pretty good job, you think with a self-deprecating quirk of your lips. Nobody has said a thing. Maybe you’re a bit less quick to laugh, or you’re more quick to get tired, or you’re slower overall, but apparently these things aren’t as glaringly obvious to everybody else as they are to you.

It’s worst late at night, when both Sans and Alphys have gone to sleep. You wish you could sleep. When you can, it’s a glorious reprieve from the worrying and the bad thoughts and the future…but, you can’t sleep most of the time. You just stay awake and let everything consume you, start thinking dark things, things that scare you.

No, you are not fine at all.

It’s about 9 at night, a Friday, and the thoughts keep swirling in your head. You bite your lip, then pull out your phone and text Sans.

“hey are you awake”

Then, a couple of minutes later:

“i really need somebody right now”

Gaster had come home particularly late that night, which meant that dinner was late, and after dinner Papyrus wanted to play a game, which means that Sans just sat down at his computer to talk with Toriel for their Friday night tradition. He accepts the call immediately. No reason to make her wait longer.

“Sans! Where were you?” 

“sorry, I—“

His phone starts buzzing, and he frowns. All of his friends know not to text him on Friday nights. Who would be texting him at this time of night anyway?

But his irritation is completely wiped away when he sees what you’ve written. “oh, crap,” he says out loud. 

“What?”

“Tori, i…need to go.”

“Huh? Why? You just got here.”

“i know, and i’m sorry. just…________ needs me right now. sorry.”

He exits out of the call, wincing, and starts thinking about how he’s going to get over to your house. He can’t ask his dad to drive him, obviously…and he can’t walk, your house is too far. 

Teleportation it is. 

He does his best to clear his mind and remember what his Magic Practice teacher has been telling him. Focus on where you need to be. Visualize it as best you can. Then, put magic behind it. Focus…

With a snapping sound and a flash of blue light, he’s out of his room.

…And in yours.

You startle from your position, huddled up in a blanket on your bed, staring miserably at your phone. “Sans?!”

He takes a moment to be proud of himself. He managed to teleport a greater distance than ever before, and to your room, no less! He’s only ever seen your room in Skype video calls and pictures, so he wasn’t even sure it would work. “hey. got your text.”

“Sans, you didn’t need to actually come over here,” you say bemusedly. He starts to feel silly, until: “But I’m glad you did. C’mere.”

He clambers onto the bed and you welcome him into your blanket burrito by throwing the blanket around his shoulders. Then, you rest your head on his shoulder (with another bit of the blanket for cushioning) and sigh.

“Thanks, Sans. I really needed this.”

“no problem.”

You freeze in realization and say, “Wait, Toriel—you have your tradition—“

“you’re more important than tradition, all right? you’re my best friend. besides, i talk to Toriel all the time. she’ll live.”

Your lips curve up into a smile. “Okay, if you say so.”

You’re both quiet for a while. Finally, Sans says, “so what’s up?”

“Just…everything. The whole thing with Undyne is really stressing me out, and I’m probably going to fail Science, and…graduation is so far away, you know? And it’s like. I just think, what if things don’t get any better? What if this is what the rest of life is like?”

“okay, well, let’s look at that. first, the thing with Undyne. by now she’s back to having cordial conversations with us again, so the next step isn’t as far away as it seems. i’ve known her longer than you have, no offense, and honestly i think that she doesn’t have it in her to hold a grudge forever.”

“Okay, I guess.”

“then, the Science thing. i can help you study for the final, but even if you do fail, it’s not required, remember?”

“Yeah…”

“and the last one. haven’t you ever seen movies about this? everything changes at graduation. you’ll start partying and wearing togas—“

You giggle. (Score.) “I’m pretty sure that both parties and togas are optional college experiences.”

“still. the point is…i worry about graduating too, all right? i have no idea what i’m doing. i applied to a few colleges, but i don’t really want to go to any of them, but i don’t have anything i want to do more, either. it’s like, some days i’m so sick of everything that i just want to drop out and start my own hot dog stand.”

“Oooh.”

“shut up, it was a childhood dream. anyway, what i’m trying to say is that nobody knows for sure what’s going to happen. but honestly, could anything be worse than this?”

“It would be difficult,” you concede.

“right. so even if it’s not better, you already know you can deal with it because you’ve dealt with this. plus, you’re strong and i believe in you and all that crap.”

“You should be a motivational speaker,” you say, a laugh tinging your voice. Then you turn somber. “But…thank you, again. And same goes for you. If I can do this, you can too.”

“thanks.”

You fall asleep like that—wrapped up in a blanket and talking together. 

Sans’ last thought before he falls asleep is actually a question. Has he ever felt this warm talking to Toriel?

Oh well, he thinks drowsily. Probably the blanket.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was originally much MUCH darker but that was Nixed in favor of this fluffball you're welcome


	20. Day 4: Period 2

“_______, we’ve talked about this. Halloween decorations are only for Halloween.”

You yawn as you’re roused from your restful sleep and stretch. Your arm hits bone, which grumbles, “five more minutes.”

Oh no.

You’re suddenly wide awake as you are faced with the very awkward situation. Obviously nothing happened, but it looks pretty bad.

“Did it just talk? Does it have, like, a voicebox?” inquires your mom.

You consider your options. Maybe you could tell Sans to shut up and play dead? But…no, Sans needs to go home, and why would you take your life-sized model skeleton with you in the car and drop it off somewhere? Maybe you could say he’s like a class hamster, where everyone in the class has to take care of Mr. Bones for a weekend. No, crap, that’s just insulting to all parties involved. Holding it for a friend? No, that makes you sound like a teenage drug dealer. Plus, there’s no way she won’t meet Sans eventually, and if you lie now it’ll make it worse later.

You decide to go with the truth. “Mom, this is my best friend, Sans. He came over last night to help me when I was having a bad time.”

You feel Sans shift at his name, then stiffen. Looks like he’s realized the problem as well.

“I see.” Her voice is surprisingly calm. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“You were already asleep, and Sans didn’t mean to stay the night anyway. It was an accident. I’m sorry.”

“And you’re sure nothing else happened?” she asks, with a piercing gaze. 

You bury your head in your hands and moan, “Mom.”

“Not an answer.”

“I am more than one hundred percent sure that nothing happened, for so many reasons.”

“All right. I’ll take your word for it.” She turns around, then calls over her shoulder, “Nice to meet you, Sans. I made French toast if either of you want any.”

Sans finally opens his eyes and sits up. “that went…much better than expected.”

“No kidding.” You sigh in relief. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to put you in this situation.”

“nah, it’s fine. i was the one who was too lazy to leave.”

“But seriously.” You look him in the eyes sincerely and say, “Thank you.”

He breaks eye contact, suddenly feeling embarrassed. “um. yeah. no problem.”

“Anyway!” You clap your hands together, all business. “Want some breakfast?”

“you know it.”

“What?” You gasp exaggeratedly. “You mean I won’t have to force feed you?”

“i’d never actually say no to free food. i just give you a hard time because it’s funny.”

You narrow your eyes at him, then grin. “It is kind of funny.”

You lead the way downstairs for breakfast, and there is indeed a glorious stack of French toast waiting. You both dig in with fervor, chatting casually in between bites. It’s all very nice. But Sans can’t shake the feeling that he’s forgetting something.

\-----------------

You don’t even bother changing out of your pajamas to drive Sans home. You’re just going to drop him off, after all, so the other drivers on the road can just deal.

The drive to his house is familiar by now, and the conversation as well. He insults your pajamas, which have little sheep on them. You pretend to be offended, and blast the theme song to Mew Mew Kissy Cutie at full volume as punishment. He says that his ears are melting. You remind him he doesn’t have any ears.

Anyway, you get to his house without anything particularly interesting happening, and you’re waving goodbye and getting back into your car, when—

“Sans! There you are!”

Oh. That’s what he was forgetting.

Gaster is storming outside, Papyrus trailing behind him. Papyrus looks like he’s been crying, and Gaster mostly just looks angry.

“You left last night without explanation, or your phone—I’ve been worried sick—“

“crap. sorry. it was sort of a last minute thing.”

“Oh, really? What was this last minute thing that was so important anyway?”

You wave weakly. He seems to notice you for the first time.

“Oh.”

“I’m so sorry, sir, it was honestly all my fault. I was having a really bad night and he came over to help, and we both fell asleep on accident.”

“I…see.”

You try to stand up straight as he inspects you clinically, wincing as you realize you’re in your pajamas. Not even cool pajamas! Crap, way to make an impression, _______.

“Well, while you’re here, why don’t you come in?”

You blanch. “Uh…I wouldn’t want to intrude…”

“No, not at all. Please.” He gestures at the door, and you hesitantly make your way inside.

Once inside, you sit in between Sans and Papyrus. “Hey, Pap, how are you doing today?”

“I’M OKAY NOW. EARLIER I WAS VERY WORRIED BECAUSE SANS WAS MISSING.”

Sans feels like a terrible person. “sorry, Pap.”

“BUT IT’S OKAY IF HE WAS WITH YOU!”

“Thanks for understanding, Papyrus. You are so great.” You honestly mean it too.

“THE GREATEST,” he agrees. 

“Papyrus, why don’t you run along upstairs while we talk?” Gaster requests.

“BUT I WANNA TALK TO ______--“

“Later. Please.”

Papyrus pouts, but does as he is told. 

As soon as he is gone, the questions start. “You all seem to get along well,” observes Gaster lightly. “Have you met Papyrus before, _______?”

“Oh, um…well, yes?” 

“oh, yeah. uh, Dad, they’ve been driving us home for the past month and a half or so.”

Gaster doesn’t have eyebrows any more than Sans does, but the look in his eyes manages to communicate an eyebrow raise nonetheless. “Is that so. You’ve never mentioned it.”

“it never seemed really important,” Sans mumbles, squirming. 

“Well, I’m sorry that my sons have been taking advantage of your kindness.”

“No, not at all! I’m happy to do it. It’s nice to spend time with them,” you assure him quickly. 

“What do you do during your time together?” Gaster inquires.

“Mostly just talk,” you say honestly, then remember you’re supposed to be playing at being in a relationship here. “Oh, and, uh…couple stuff. Like, um. Getting matching crap and arguing over monogrammed towels.”

“Really. Is that all?”

You send a panicked look Sans’ way.

Sans offers, “once we went fencing.” You shove him as he snickers.

“All right, let me be more direct, then.” Gaster steeples his fingers and looks at you directly in the eye. “Are you and my son sexually active?”

You choke and start coughing. Sans sputters, “Dad!”

“It’s an important question.” Gaster says calmly.

Sans wishes the floor would swallow him up. You’re rigid next to him, opening and closing your mouth uselessly.

“neither of us are sexually active, especially with each other! sheesh, Dad.”

“Oh.” He looks like he doesn’t believe Sans. “Because if you were, I would want to remind you to use protection.”

“dear God.”

“I know with young love, such things can sometimes be overlooked in—the heat of the moment, let us say—“

“let me die now.”

“But you are neither of you invulnerable to venereal diseases—“

“please stop.”

“And I would just want to make sure both of you were safe.”

“we are, we are!” Sans says desperately. He means that you’re both safe because you don’t do anything, but he realizes too late that it sounds like he’s admitting that you two have been up to something. “i mean—“

“Good,” says Gaster with a placid smile. “I’m glad we had this little talk.”

Sans peeks at you. You’re pale and frozen, staring straight ahead at the wall. 

Crap, he broke you.

“I’m going to go check on Papyrus while you two say your goodbyes,” Gaster says, rising from his seat and flashing Sans a meaningful look.

“yeah, sure.”

Once Gaster is out of sight, Sans shakes you. “are you even alive in there?”

“I think I may have just had a stroke,” you say dazedly.

“i am so sorry. i had no idea—“

“No, it’s…fine.” You smile tightly. “It’s completely fine that my science teacher thinks I’m doing the jinky with his son. I am fine.”

“i’m sorry, and i realize this is the worst situation ever, but—‘doing the jinky’? seriously?”

“Horizontal limbo?”

“just call it sex like everyone else!”

“Hanky panky?”

“you’re so embarrassing.”

“The frickity-frack,” you say, starting to giggle. “The thunder down under. The hibbety-dibbety.”

“making a magical sandwich,” he says, starting to get into it. “dunking the dingus.”

So, that’s how Gaster returns to find you both exchanging increasingly creative euphemisms for sex while laughing hysterically. “violating the prime directive!”

“Oscillating the unmentionables!”

“slapping sloppies!”

Gaster wonders for a moment where he went wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow sex euphemisms sure are...a wild ride. WINK, BADUMTSHHH
> 
> btw i havent said this on here yet but thank you so much everybody for reading, giving kudos, and commenting! i really appreciate it you have no idea how much i smile reading the comments and how happy they make me feel so seriously thank you


	21. Day 4: Period 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cw this chapter for nongraphic bullying

It’s Monday, the last week of school before winter break, and Toriel is acting decidedly strange. Even Asgore picks up on it.

“Dear, you’re being very…quiet. Is there something the matter?”

“No, there is not.”

“Are you sure?”

“Quite,” she says icily, and he draws back in confusion. “Oh. I…I’m sorry, that was rude, wasn’t it? Please forgive me. I had a bad weekend,” she explains, very pointedly not looking at Sans.

Oh. In all the ensuing excitement, he had almost completely forgotten that he had to hang up on Toriel to be with _______.

“Tori—“

“Please, everyone, can you just leave me be? I don’t trust myself to be…” She hesitates. “Controlled.”

“Tori, i didn’t mean—“

“Please.”

Sans falls silent. You notice and put an arm around his shoulder for support. You look up and see Toriel staring at you.

What’s going on?

“All right, well, I’m headed off to P.E.,” says Undyne awkwardly, picking up on the tense atmosphere. “Uh…_______, Sans, you two wanna walk with me?”

You perk up. She’s gone on ahead without you for the past month or so. “Yeah, yeah, of course! Sans, c’mon—“

“i have something i need to do, sorry.”

“Huh? But—“

“just go on ahead. i’ll see you in the gym.”

“Well, okay,” you say, confused. Undyne offers the first olive branch in a month and Sans isn’t excited about it? You know he’s been just as worked up about her being mad at you both.

But then you see Toriel stand up and start walking away, and he runs after her, and you understand. 

Your heart pangs in an unfamiliar manner. You ignore it and go to Undyne with an energy you don’t really feel.

Sans catches up to Toriel and latches onto her arm. “Tori, wait—“

“Please, let me go! I don’t want to talk to you! I’d think you would understand the sentiment.”

“what? Tori, i always want to talk to you, it’s just—“

“No, no, I get it. You just want to talk to your datefriend more. I’m fine. Let me go!”

“Tori, no—you’re not understanding—“

“I don’t want them to be more important to you than I am!” she finally bursts out, tearing her arm out of Sans’ grasp and facing him. “I feel like I’m losing you, and I hate it!”

Sans stands, flabbergasted. The other students raise eyebrows and snicker as they pass around him and Toriel. “Tori, you’ll…you’ll always have me,” he says, and a part of him hopes that she will pick up on the emotion in his voice. He wishes he were brave enough to say it. If only she could understand that the two things are different—but, he can’t tell her, he can’t—

“I know. That’s not what I mean. I mean—I don’t even know what I mean! Please, leave me.”

As she pushes away through the crowd, Sans finally lets her go.

Sans doesn’t show up to P.E. that day. You see Mr. Staehl mark him absent with a frown. 

“He’s…really into her, isn’t he,” remarks Undyne softly.

“He really, really is,” you sigh. 

“I didn’t understand why either of you would lie at first. It just didn’t seem like a rational course of events, you know? But…looking at Sans, and how he acts around Toriel…it actually does sort of make sense that he’d do something so completely ridiculous because of her. In a weird, twisted way.”

“Yeah.” You perch your elbow on your knees and your hand on your chin. “It’s honestly…like, I try to be understanding, but it gets kind of overbearing at times. I can’t believe she doesn’t know. He’s so obvious.”

“He kind of is,” acknowledges Undyne with a bark of a laugh. “I can’t believe we didn’t see it either.” Then she grows serious. “But what I’m trying to say is…I know you were dragged into this against your will, and that you were just trying to help out a friend. And I sort of get where Sans is coming from too. So I don’t think it makes sense to be mad at you two anymore.”

You start in surprise, and look at her, eyes wide. “Really? You mean it?”

“Yeah. Like, I’m still pissed that you lied, but—oof!”

You’ve launched yourself into her and are hugging her tightly. “Thank you, thank you! I promise I won’t lie about anything ever again, cross my heart—“

“Yeah, yeah,” she says dryly. “And get off me. This is embarrassing.”

“Oh. Sorry!” You extricate yourself and grin at her helplessly. “I’m just so happy.”

She snorts. “Dork.”

“You know it.”

\-----------------

You skip into science, hoping to tell Sans and Alphys the good news, when you gasp. 

Sans is hung upside down on the hook again, and everybody is giggling. He’s flushed an incredible shade of blue as he tries to keep his tshirt from pooling around his neck. Alphys is cowering in a corner.

“Crap. Sans!” You rush over to him.

“please get me off here before my dad comes in.”

“But who did this—“

“please,” he says desperately. “he can’t know.”

You unhook him, just like the first day you met, and set him right side up, but keep him wrapped in your arms. “You’re going to tell me who did this,” you murmur into his ear.

“fine, okay.”

“What a sweet display of public affection, but if you two would mind getting to your seats…” rings out Gaster’s voice coldly from behind you.

You cringe and release Sans. “Sorry, sir.”

You meekly make your way to your seat, and immediately fish out your notebook and pencil, handing them emphatically to Sans. You point at an area on top of the notebook and look at him sternly.

“aaron,” he scrawls out quickly and passes your notebook back to you. You read it, and your face darkens. You look, frankly, murderous.

“how long”

“idk. a while”

“Please stop passing notes in class,” comes Gaster’s voice from behind again. “If you would.”

Neither of you notice him reading the notes quickly as you snap your notebook shut. “Sorry, sir!”

When class ends, you wait until everyone else is gone save Alphys, Dr. Gaster, and Sans, and block the door before Aaron can leave. “We need to have a talk,” you say sweetly.

“Haha, what about, babe? ; )”

“How do you even wink out loud?” You shake your head. “Wait, not the point.”

“I could show you a point ; )”

“Ew, no thanks.” You get up very close to him, next to his ear, and whisper, “You wanna know what the point is? The point is, if you come near my boyfriend again, scumbag, I’ll show you how pointy I can be.”

“Sexy ; )” 

“By which I mean I’ll sic Asgore on you.”

“Less sexy ; (“

“Right.” You pat him on the shoulder lightly and push him out the door. “Now off you get.”

“what did you just do?” hisses Sans in horror. “confronting him just makes it worse! he’s going to—“

“No, he won’t, promise—“ you try to reassure him in hushed tones.

“Trouble in paradise?” asks Gaster smoothly. You immediately straighten up.

“Nope, sir! Sans was just, um…”

“saying, uh…their eyes are really pretty.”

“Ah.” He has that I-don’t-believe-you look on again. “Well. If you two would kindly get out of the doorway…?“

“Oh! Sorry.” You get out of the way, Gaster leaves, and Alphys tiptoes up to you, looking miserable.

“______? I’m so sorry I didn’t do anything, he threatened—“

“Don’t worry about it, Alphys,” you say grimly. “I’m not going to let him get away with crap like this anymore.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> another chapter for all of you lovely folks
> 
> back to teenage angst lol
> 
> oh btw for those of you that havent read my sans or gaster fics before this one--my tumblr is anuninterestingperson! feel free to drop by anytime i love talking to new people so~~


	22. Day 4: Period 4

Sans is quiet the entire length of the drive to Papyrus’ school. You try to engage him in conversation, but he just continues staring out the window. 

You wish you could help, but you honestly have no idea what he’s upset about. Toriel? Aaron? Politics? Probably not politics, but you couldn’t rule it out.

Papyrus, on the other hand, is all talk when he reaches the car. “FAKE DATEFRIEND! BROTHER! METTATON HAS GIVEN ME THE PERFECT BOOK TO HELP YOU DEAL WITH YOUR SITUATION!”

You laugh. “I don’t really think—“

“IT’S ABOUT TWO PEOPLE WHO FAKE DATE AND THEN FALL IN LOVE! SO, YOU SEE, THE SOLUTION IS SIMPLE. ALL YOU TWO HAVE TO DO IS FALL IN LOVE AND THEN THINGS WILL BE PERFECT!”

Your smile freezes. “Uh, Pap—“

“IS IT NOT A FLAWLESS PLAN?” he boasts. “YOU CAN THANK ME AS MANY TIMES AS YOU WANT.”

“I don’t—“ You shoot a worried glance at Sans, who is still looking out the window despondently. “I don’t really think that Sans—“

“Papyrus, you need to get your head out of the clouds.” Sans suddenly says. “true love is a myth. these stories are all fiction.”

Toriel, then. You literally facepalm. “Sans—“

“PLEASE DON’T SAY LIES, BROTHER! THESE ARE TRUE, AUTOBIOGRAPHICAL ACCOUNTS OF LOVE AND ROMANCE! LINDA AND RAMON ARE PERFECTLY SUITED, THOUGH OF COURSE, NOT AS MUCH AS—“ Papyrus fishes out another book and displays it proudly—“SAMUEL AND THE DASHING, MYSTERIOUS YOUNG UNICORN LARRY.” The cover features a shirtless young man pressed lovingly against a rainbow unicorn ripped straight from a Lisa Frank folder.

“What kind of books are you reading?!”

“ONLY THE BEST ONES,” Papyrus says smugly. “I CAN LEND THEM TO YOU IF YOU WOULD LIKE.”

“That’s very generous of you, but I have to pass on this one. Now buckle up, please.”

You sneak another peek at Sans and roll your eyes. “Sans, seriously.”

“what?”

“I know you’re upset about Toriel, but—“

“what do you know?” he snaps.

You finally vocalize your thoughts from the past few months. “I know that you’re running yourself ragged over something you can’t control. Toriel will realize she’s being irrational soon enough, but you have to realize you’re being silly too. You spend all of this time and energy being worried about Toriel. Wouldn’t it be nice to take a deep breath and step back from it all?” 

“what is it with you and ragging on Toriel, huh? why can’t you just leave us alone?!”

“Sans, I just want you to be happy.”

“you know what would make me happy right now? you shutting up.”

Your eyebrows raise sky high. “Okay, wow? You’re taking the angsty teenager routine a bit too far.”

“and you’re taking the concerned parent thing too far! you don’t know anything about anything. you don’t know what it’s like to be in love!”

You frown, checking on Papyrus in the back seat. He looks small and sad. “No, I don’t, Sans. But from what I’ve seen, it hasn’t done you much good. Have you considered, like…giving up? I mean…” Without thinking, you say, “It’s not like she’s ever going to love you back.”

You don’t even realize what you’ve said, really, until the car door opens. You yelp and slow down, pulling over to the side of the road. “Sans, what the heck?”

“i’m walking the rest of the way home.”

You mentally go over the past few moments and gasp. “Crap, Sans, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to—“

“don’t try to talk to me anymore. c’mon, Pap, let’s go.”

Papyrus looks between you and Sans worriedly. “BUT—“

“fine, or stay with them, you traitor! i don’t care!”

Without giving Papyrus a chance to respond, Sans slams the door shut and starts walking away moodily.

You consider going after him, but you don’t think he’s going to get back in the car anytime soon. “Papyrus, I am so sorry.”

“I WOULD SAY IT IS FINE, BUT IT ISN’T REALLY.”

“I know. I’m sorry.”

You drive Papyrus home in silence and drop him off after checking to make sure he can get in the house without Sans. Driving home, you berate yourself for being so thoughtless. You know Toriel is a hot-button issue for him.

You, you reflect, have hecked up.

\------------------

Sans isn’t used to walking this far anymore. His bones ache, and he scowls. It’s all your fault. You just don’t get it!

“It’s not like she’s ever going to love you back,” your voice echoes in his head.

He knows that. He…he knows that. But…as he kicks a pebble and exhales heavily, he realizes. He has been holding out a hope this whole time that somehow, someday, Toriel would realize Asgore was a mistake and that he was the one for her. That they were meant to be.

What a pathetic loser he is, he thinks miserably.

But is it so terrible for him to want to be loved? Is that such a bad thing? He just wants somebody to talk with him, and to laugh with him, and to help him when he’s having a bad time. Somebody who really, genuinely cares about him.

Somebody sort of like you, his treacherous mind offers, and his scowl darkens even further.

What does that even mean, take a deep breath and step back? What, like stop being friends with Toriel? He can’t do that. He wouldn’t do that. Not to her, not to himself.

Or maybe, that dark little part of his mind offers up again, they see how dangerously dependent you are on Toriel’s good opinion, and they want you to be safe and happy without relying on her.

Shut up, he thinks back. You’re the worst brain ever.

He’s walking the way back to his house, but he hesitates before switching to the route to Grillby’s. He doesn’t want to deal with Papyrus right now.

He enters Grillby’s, and Grillby himself flares up a bit when he notices him.

“yeah, i know, it’s been a while. sorry.”

“No problem,” signs Grillby. “I just worry.”

“yeah, i know. hey, can i have some fries with extra ketchup? hold the fries?”

Grillby’s flames dance in amusement. “So just ketchup then?”

“yeah. thanks, Grillbz.”

Grillby is an old friend of the family. They used to come here all the time, but Papyrus got ‘standards’ so they haven’t visited as much. Sans still tries to come here when he can. He shouldn’t technically be allowed in there unsupervised—it’s a bar, after all, with a restaurant component—but he gets away with it because Grillby is the owner.

Grillby returns with some Heinz, and Sans feigns surprise. “why, Grillby. what’s the occasion?”

“No occasion,” he signs. “You look down.”

“oh. yeah.”

“Need to talk?”

“maybe, but i don’t really want to.”

“Fair enough.”

The familiar warmth of the bar—mostly deserted at this time of day, except for a few regulars—relaxes him, and the ketchup is good, and he can almost forget about everything. 

Almost.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> is sans terribly ooc in this? yes
> 
> is this on purpose for the reason of creating more teenage angst? also yes


	23. Day 4: Period 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> food ment, implication of infidelity

He gets home just before his dad, which is good because he doesn’t want a repeat of Saturday. He stomps up to his room, slams the door, and doesn’t come back out until dinner.

At dinner, he pokes at his food. He’s still angry, but he’s calmed down a bit—enough to realize that he might have overreacted, at least slightly.

“How’s _______?” asks Gaster innocently.

Sans gives a particularly vicious jab to a potato. “i don’t know. we’re fighting.”

“Oh?”

“yeah. i don’t want to talk about it.”

“Why not?”

“because you wouldn’t understand!”

“Try me.”

Sans scowls at his plate. “fine. okay. hypothetically speaking, what if you were in love with someone, and you used someone else to make that person jealous, and now you’re not sure what to do because you’re friends with the second person but they’re interfering with your relationship with the first person, and you don’t want to give up either one of them? what do you do then, huh?”

Gaster considers. “Well, I’d say you’d need to make a decision of some kind, to avoid hurting both people.”

“but i don’t want to, that’s the point! i want both of them in my life!”

“You can’t have your cake and eat it too,” Gaster says coldly. 

“but—“

“Really, Sans, I thought I had raised you better than this.” 

“what?”

“I suspected when I saw your notes in class, but to hear it confirmed…I’m terribly disappointed.”

“huh? why?”

“Because cheating is wrong!” He slams his fist on the table. “You can’t have both Aaron and _______, Sans!”

_What._

“i. beg your pardon?”

“Now, I don’t know _______ very well, but I know they don’t deserve this—“

“Dad, what the crap are you talking about?”

“Your double relationship with Aaron and _______. You’re saying you used ________ to make Aaron jealous, right? And now you want them to stay friends with you even though you’re in a secret relationship with Aaron? I can’t believe your nerve!”

“what the frick?”

“Like I said, I saw your notes in class, Sans. _______ asked you who, and you said Aaron, and they asked how long, and you said a while, and then you fought going out the door, surely about your relationship—“

Sans raises his hands. “whoa, okay, you need to stop right there. and turn around, and never go there again. i am not in love with Aaron.”

“…You’re not?”

“i hate that guy, so yeah, no.” Sans can feel a headache starting to come on. “and i’m not cheating on ________, either.”

“Then—“

Sans is tired of lying. He’s tired in general. “i was never dating _______, okay? we started a fake relationship because i wanted to make Toriel jealous. and now i’m friends with _______, but they want me to stop obsessing over Toriel because they think it’s unhealthy, and Toriel is jealous because she thinks ________ is more important to me than she is, and it’s all a huge colossal mess.” He lets out an aggrieved sigh. “so there we are. you know the truth. congratulations. can i go upstairs and scream now?”

Gaster looks like his whole world has been unmoored. “Then…what were the notes about?”

“Aaron messes around with me sometimes, okay?” He sees his dad’s expression and blanches. “ew, no, not like that! like, he likes to pick on me. today he hung me up on the anatomical model hook, and _______ rescued me, and they wanted to know who did it and how long, and then they got pissed off and confronted him.”

“He did what?!”

“see, this is why i didn’t want to tell you! this is why i don’t tell you anything! you make such a big deal out of nothing—“

“This is not nothing. This is a plot straight out of a very bad soap opera!”

Sans can’t really deny that. “yeah, well, the point is, i’m fine on my own.”

“Really? Because it seems like you’re struggling. I don’t understand why you won’t let me help! And lying to me about _______—“

“you were the one that made assumptions! i just went along with it! that’s what i always have to do, just go along with your crap, and i am so tired of it—“

“You’re tired? How do you think I feel? I’m trying to keep this family together, and you’re constantly—“

“SHUT UP!”

Sans and Gaster immediately quiet and stare at Papyrus, who is standing up and breathing hard.

“YOU KNOW WHO IS TIRED? ME. I AM SO SICK OF YOU TWO FIGHTING! IF YOU TWO WOULD EVER JUST LISTEN TO EACH OTHER, YOU’D REALIZE THAT YOU DON’T HAVE SO MANY DIFFERENCES AFTER ALL, AND MAYBE YOU WOULD GET ALONG! BUT YOU DON’T EVEN BOTHER TRYING BECAUSE YOU’RE BOTH SO CONVINCED THAT YOU’RE RIGHT. WELL. YOU ARE BOTH WRONG. I AM THE ONLY ONE WHO IS RIGHT HERE.” Papyrus crosses his arms. “I’M NOT LEAVING UNTIL YOU BOTH APOLOGIZE. AND HUG. THE HUG IS MANDATORY.”

Sans leans back in his chair and looks away. He feels bad for doing this in front of Papyrus, but it’s not his fault his dad is so—

“I’m sorry.” He looks back at his dad and sees him massaging his temple. “Papyrus is right. I shouldn’t be blowing up at you like this.”

“SANS?”

“…’m sorry.”

“GOOD. NOW HUG.”

“do we have to?”

“YES!”

Unwillingly, Sans stands and gives his dad an awkward hug. 

“EXCELLENT. NOW, I AM GOING TO GO UPSTAIRS AND READ ABOUT UNICORN LOVE. PLEASE DO NOT DISTURB ME.” With that, Papyrus gives a dignified nod, then turns around to head for the stairs. Gaster and Sans stare after him.

“welp.”

“Sans—“

“yeah?”

“Do you still want advice?”

“…i guess.”

“Talk to them,” Gaster says simply. “Explain how you’re feeling. Maybe we can’t get there, but I’m sure you and your friends can.” 

“it’s not that simple.”

“It really is, though.” He stands up. “Talk to them.” Then, he too leaves the table.

Sans is left sitting alone with a plate full of cold food and a head full of roiling thoughts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next chapter: Sans takes his dad's advice for once


	24. Day 4: Period 6

snas added _______ to this conversation

snas added Toriel (: to this conversation

snas  
my dad had better be right

________  
??????

Toriel (:  
?

Sans clicks the call button and lets out a deep breath.

The first thing he hears is you. “Sans, what is this about?”

Toriel seconds the sentiment. “I’ll admit I am curious as well.”

“ok, let’s get some things straight first. for one, _______, i’m still pissed at you.”

You frown. “Sans, you have every right to be mad, but I am sorry. I really didn’t mean it.”

“i know. otherwise i wouldn’t be talking to you.”

“Fair enough.”

“for two, Toriel, you’re super important to me and nothing will ever change that.”

“I know. I overreacted. It’s fine that you’re with _______, and it’s fine that you spend time with them.”

That takes Sans aback. He was expecting more argument. “wait, what?”

“You’re my best friend, Sans. I should be happy for you no matter what. It’s selfish of me to want to monopolize your time.”

“well—yeah, but—“ He hesitates. Should he really do this? But, in the end, he forges through. “um, i sort of liked it.”

“…Pardon me?”

“like…it felt nice, having you be jealous over me. i kinda liked it. it made me think, just for a moment—well—that i might have a chance.”

“I do not understand what you are saying.” You don’t understand either. It sounds kind of like—

“Tori, i’m in love with you.”

Your jaw drops. He actually went for it. Holy crap.

There is a long silence, before, “I—what?”

“i have been for a long time. that’s why i got so pissy when you got together with Asgore. and—like, you don’t have to do anything about it, it’s just i feel like i need to tell you before i can move on.”

Another long pause. “Sans…”

“yeah?”

“I could sort of tell.”

His SOUL pulses in his chest. “what?”

“You’re…not terribly subtle. I knew you liked me, but I didn’t know what to do about it.”

You suddenly begin to feel outraged for Sans. How dare she? She knew all along and didn’t say anything—what, to torture him? To lord his feelings over him? How could she—

“you…knew? and you didn’t say anything?”

“What would I have said, Sans? I didn’t want to hurt your feelings. I care about you deeply, but…not in the way you want.”

Even though he had sort of known that all along, it still hurts.

“Anyway, that’s why I was so happy when I saw you with ________. I thought you had finally moved on. But…you’re saying you never did? What are you doing with ________, then? ________ doesn’t deserve—“

You interrupt, still a little bit irritated. “I knew. I’m fine with it.”

“You are? Why?” She sounds shocked.

“Um…”

“because we were never really together,” says Sans guiltily, in a small voice.

“What?”

“when you asked if we were in a relationship, i said yes because i wanted to make you jealous. we were just having lunch. we didn’t even know each other very well, but i said yes because i’m a jerk and i dragged ________ into it even though we had only known each other for three days and now everything’s a mess and i just want it to be over, ok? so you can hate me now, or whatever. i’m sorry for lying to you.”

Holy crap. Not only did he go for it, he went all the way. 

“Um, for the record, I am also sorry,” you pipe up. “I didn’t want to lie from the beginning, but—“

“Can you both just be quiet for a moment while I process this?”

You both shut your mouths immediately at her commanding tone. 

“This entire time, you were never together? It was all just an act?”

“um…yeah. sorry.”

“If I hear sorry one more time from either of you—“ She takes a deep breath. “Okay. Wow. Was I the only one who didn’t know?”

“Alphys and Undyne found out on our double date last month,” he admits. 

“If it’s any comfort, I don’t think Asgore knows either,” you offer in a tone that is perhaps overly cheery. You’re so glad you don’t have to lie anymore. You feel so incredibly free.

“you’re not helping,” Sans hisses.

You shrug.

The silence is overbearing. 

Finally, Toriel speaks. “I am not very happy right now.”

Sans winces. “yeah.”

“You know I hate liars, Sans!”

Shrinking back, he says unhappily, “yeah.”

“And all to make me jealous? What kind of twisted reasoning is that?”

“not…the good kind?”

“The very bad kind, Sans! The worst!”

“um…yeah.”

“Pardon my language, but you are an ass, Sans.”

“that is, um, probably true.”

“Definitely true!”

“okay, yeah, definitely!”

“But…” She sighs deeply. “I suppose I had some part in this as well. I did make some assumptions. You are incredibly wrong for going along with them, but I cannot deny my involvement.”

“so…?”

“So, I’m still incredibly angry right now. But I’m not going to stop being friends with you.”

Sans feels his SOUL leap and dance with happiness. “thank you so much!”

Her attention turns to you. “_______, I apologize for Sans’ behavior, because he probably hasn’t.”

“He hasn’t, no.” You bite your lip, then say, “But I was a butt to him too, so…even?”

“sure, even.” He is feeling very magnanimous right now.

The ensuing silence is much more comfortable.

At least it is, until Toriel asks curiously, “So does this mean you don’t actually write skeleton porn?”

You choke. “I beg your pardon?”

“Sans said that was how you two met.” 

Dangerously, you respond, “Is that so.”

“oh…heh…i had forgotten about that.”

“I take it back. We’re not even. You are going to owe me for the rest of your life.”

“that’s probably fair.”

“That’s a pity,” Toriel says wistfully. “I was going to ask to read it someday.”

It’s Sans who makes the unintelligible garbling noise this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the beans have been Officially Spilled
> 
> also, please note the chapter count! this is planned out to be thirty chapters long, because a school week is five days long with six periods each and--yeah lol. anyway please stick with me for the next six chapters!


	25. Day 5: Period 1

It’s a surprisingly beautiful afternoon in the middle of March, and you and Sans are lying on the grass outside your house basking in the sun.

“So you’re saying you think you’re over her?”

“yeah. i mean…she’s always going to hold a special place in my SOUL, but i’m not into her like that anymore, you know?”

You roll over on your side to grin at him. “Good for you! My little boy is growing up.”

“ha ha. what about you, over me yet?”

You throw an arm dramatically over your forehead. “Never,” you proclaim. “I still fake yearn for your fake love. It’s fake terrible.”

“double ha. c’mon, it wasn’t that bad, was it?”

“Nah, I guess not.” You consider, then roll back onto your back and stare up at the sky. “So. Got anyone else in mind, then?” Your heart pangs in that now-familiar way at the thought of him with someone else, and you frown contemplatively.

“what, to fake date?”

“No, to real date, you dork.”

He considers. “i mean, the person i spend the most time with is you.”

You both slowly flush as you mull over that statement.

“i mean, not like that, just—there isn’t any time—“

“Yeah, no, I get it.”

“good, ‘cause, heh. yeah.”

You sniff haughtily. “Please. Anybody would be lucky to have me.”

“yeah, yeah,” he waves off. “if they can get past your terrible taste in, like, everything.”

You gasp and prop yourself up on your hands next to him. “My taste in everything is flawless, and you are out of line, sir.”

“nah, i’m right. the only thing that isn’t terrible is your taste in friends.” He smirks up at you, and you blow him a raspberry like the mature adult you are, then collapse back on the grass.

“Can you believe school is almost over?”

“we have until June.”

“I know, but. That’s only a few months.”

“still too long.”

“Agreed. But…doesn’t it ever scare you?”

“what?”

“The future. Graduating. College. You know.”

“i guess it might if i ever thought about it.”

“How can you not think about it? Tell me your secrets, please, because I’ve been agonizing over college acceptance letters since February.”

“i just decided to not care.”

“Easier said than done,” you grumble. “Anyway, I’ll be happy at this point if I get into any college.”

“same. my dad will kill me if i don’t.”

“I’ll come to your funeral in a string of pearls and with a white handkerchief and pretend to be your grieving spouse.”

“well, thank goodness that’s taken care of. i thought i would have to hire somebody.”

“What else are friends for?”

“food.” Then he rolls over to face you and smiles softly. “and good company.”

Your heart does that thing again, and you look away.

Later that night, you Google it. “heart hurts sometimes,” you type eloquently into the search bar, and press enter.

It returns a bunch of results for chest pain, but nothing particularly helpful. You sigh and message Alphys.

_______ 9:47 PM  
well the good news is the internet thinks i have a heart condition

ALPHYS 9:51 PM  
lol

ALPHYS 9:51 PM  
so how did your date with sans today go? ;) 

_______ 9:51 PM  
what the frick it wasn’t a date he just came over to my house? he comes over to my house? all the time????

ALPHYS 9:53 PM  
well it could’ve been a date if you two weren’t so stubborn!!

________ 9:54 PM  
for the last frickin time alphys i dont have a crush on sans and he sure as crap doesnt have a crush on me

ALPHYS 9:57 PM  
but you two would be so perfect together! i have no idea how you don’t see it!!!

________ 9:57 PM  
we tried that once remember? lol

ALPHYS 9:58 PM  
that doesn’t count.

_________ 10:00 PM  
if ur gonna be like this im gonna do homework

ALPHYS 10:01 PM  
do your homework anyway lol! but ok, ok, i’ll drop it

_________ 10:01 PM  
thank you

Alphys, Undyne, and even Toriel have been on your case about this since the whole incident with Toriel back in December. The few days between The Skype Call and winter break had been kind of awkward for Toriel and Sans as they learned to navigate their newly reformed relationship, which was especially hard with Toriel still mad about Sans lying.

As for Asgore—

“Oh, I knew from day one,” he rumbles apologetically. “Your acting is terrible, sorry.”

“I’d like to see you do better,” you snap, offended even though it’s the truth.

“That could be arranged.” He gives you a wink that leaves you speechless until Toriel shoves him.

“Stop flirting with ______, Asgore.”

“Sorry, dear.”

You and Sans had been a bit awkward for a bit there too, but quickly fell into an easy rhythm. Nothing much changed, except for the exchanging of pet names, which was running dry anyway.

You still spent most of winter break together, not to mention most of the following semester. It had become commonplace for you to study over at Sans’ house, or for Sans to have dinner at yours. Your mom loves him and thinks you should, quote, “get on that”. You tell her never to say those words again.

Anyway, the more time you and Sans spend together, the more the other members of your little lunch group insist that you’d make a cute couple. You’re still not sure if Sans gets this much crap from them, but you’re personally starting to get tired of it. You’d know if you had a crush on Sans, right? Probably. Yes. Maybe?

Whatever. 

There are some good things, though. Like Aaron—he hasn’t bothered Sans since the day you threatened him. Sometimes in Science you’ll look up and see him watching you, but other than that, he’s been pretty quiet. And, speaking of Science, you didn’t fail the final! You didn’t do the best, either, but you did enough to keep your grade afloat, and that’s all you cared about. It seems like Sans’ tutoring is finally starting to pay off. 

Sans is also no longer failing P.E. He hasn’t skipped again since that day with Aaron, and Mr. Staehl seems to recognize the effort he puts in to doing the days’ activities, however minimal. 

Personally, you’ve been babysitting those kids from before pretty regularly. They’ve grown on you, and you on them. Frisk keeps asking for you to bring Sans, though. You guess you must have mentioned him at some point. 

Papyrus has joined his school play at the urging of his friend Mettaton, and appears to be enjoying it immensely. Alphys and Undyne are getting along swimmingly, and Toriel and Asgore are still very romantic and disgusting. But they’re your friends, and you wouldn’t have them any other way.

All in all, you reflect as you start your homework, life is pretty good.

Except for homework. Homework will always suck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is p much just setting up stuff for future chapters, move along, nothing to see here


	26. Day 5: Period 2

The next week, Headspace is filled with posts from people getting into colleges. Your own letter from your first choice—a school in the next town over with pretty good academics—arrives on a Wednesday. You bite your lip, then hide it from your mom. You want to open it with your friends around you. That way, if you don’t get in, they’ll be there to comfort you. 

The next day, you slip the letter in your backpack and head off to school, anxiety rising all the while. You get through your first class on the edge of the seat. When the bell rings, you’re immediately running out the door to the lunch table at the pavilion.

Your feet tap impatiently at the ground as you wait for the others to arrive. You pull out the letter reverently, place it in front of you on the table, and just stare.

After what seems like an eternity, everyone is there and watching as you gulp and open the letter. Sans is next to you with a comforting hand on your shoulder, just in case. You unfold the letter, and—

“I got in,” you say wonderingly. A bright grin spreads across your face. “I got in!”

“Congratulations,” say Toriel and Asgore at more or less the same time; Undyne says “Good job, squirt” and Alphys says “I knew you would!”

Sans smiles at you and says, “see, you worry too much.” Your heart swells and you gather him up into a tight hug. “whoa, okay, okay.”

His SOUL jumps, and he wonders for a moment what’s going on. Whatever.

“Thank you,” you murmur into his hoodie, and he shivers. Then you separate from him and beam at everybody. “Thank you all!”

“You deserve it,” says Toriel. (She and Asgore already have their acceptances from the state school a few hours away). 

You pull out your phone and text your mom “I GOT IN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” and add a few dozen emojis for good measure. 

“WHAT IT CAME” she responds, then “CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

“wanted to open it at school sorry;;;”

“it’s fine. hey be sure to text your dad!”

“mommmmmmmm”

“or at least post it on headspace so that he can see”

“fine”

You make a quick update on Headspace, then put away your phone, mood slightly dampened by the thought of your dad. But only slightly.

“So, what are you going to do to celebrate?” asks Alphys.

“Celebrate? Not really anything. I have to babysit tonight.” A thought occurs to you. “Hey, Sans, you should come along.”

“what? why?”

“One of the kids wants to meet you. You don’t have to do anything, just show up and say hi.”

“well…”

“Come on. There’ll be dinner? I can make your favorite.”

“fine, okay. what time?”

“Like 5. So we have time to drop off Papyrus and everything.”

“all right.”

The rest of the gang watches you two planning with amused expressions. You look up to see Undyne making kissy faces at you and scowl. They’re honestly too much sometimes.

Later that day, you pick up Papyrus as per normal and drive to their house. Papyrus gets out of your car, and Sans follows suit. You look at him questioningly, and he explains, “i just wanted to check the mail first.” 

He walks to the mailbox and opens it. Inside are two envelopes that fill him with equal parts excitement and dread.

The first is an envelope that looks identical to yours from earlier today. The second is a very thick envelope from one of the top science schools in the nation.

Honestly, he wouldn’t even had applied if it weren’t for Gaster looking over his shoulder the entire process. He had no interest in moving across the country to go to some elite school. The school you had applied to had a pretty good physics program and it was close by. That’s all he wanted.

Hand trembling slightly, he opens the envelope from the nearby school.

Acceptance. Thank God.

Then he opens the thick envelope.

Acceptance.

Crap.

“Sans?” you call out to him from the car’s open window. “You okay there?”

“fine,” he yells back, and shoves the envelopes in the pocket of his hoodie. “i’m coming.”

\-----------------

Frisk is overjoyed to see Sans, and greets him as one might an old friend who you hadn’t seen for years. They lead him by hand into their room to show them a collection of drawings, mostly of flowers and underground caverns. With particular pride, they show him a drawing of a quaint little snowy town and a house decorated with Christmas lights.

“very nice,” he says, bemused. He looks at you, and you shrug. Frisk is an odd little kid, but cute.

While Chara still acts quite aloof towards you, Asriel has warmed up to you quite a bit. When you walk in the house, he runs to you to cling to your hand and doesn’t let go until you insist you have to make dinner.

You start preparations for cooking, but call over your shoulder, “Hey, I have some stuff in my bag to keep them occupied. Would you take it out and get them started?”

Just come by and say hello, sure. He is surprised to find that he doesn’t mind as much as he usually might, though. He digs through your bag to find a Ziploc bag filled with construction paper, scissors, glue, and other various craft items—rhinestones and feathers and the like.

“what am i supposed to do with this?”

“I was thinking they could do Easter eggs, but anything, really.”

He provides them the supplies and the children dig into them with gusto. Asriel is painstakingly outlining an egg on some pink construction paper, while Chara appears to have hoarded all the scissors and is licensing them out to the other children in exchange for the best gems. Frisk isn’t making an egg at all. They’re making a weirdly shaped and unappealing-looking creature.

“hey, what’s that you’re making there?” Sans asks out of curiosity.

Frisk pulls out their tablet and types, “It’s my friend Jerry.”

“…oh. okay.”

Soon enough dinner is ready and the supplies are cleared to one side of the table. You did indeed make Sans’ favorite, as promised, and the kids appear to like it just as much.

After dinner, the kids always start getting tired, so you all sit down to watch a movie. Asriel has reattached himself to you and is cuddled up against you on the couch, with Chara and Frisk on your other side, bickering companionably. Sans is pressed up against the edge of the couch somewhat uncomfortably. You hand him a pillow and he smiles gratefully at you. You nod back and return to watching the movie.

Eventually, it’s time for the kids to be put to bed. Sans is napping on the couch. Asriel is already sleeping as well—and snoring—so he’s the easiest. Chara hates going to bed on time and is slightly harder to contain, but you promise that you’ll bring something special next time if they behave. They narrow their eyes and ask, “What kind of special thing?”

“A secret special thing.” You have no idea. 

“All right. But it had better be very special,” they sniff.

Frisk is the last. You tuck them in and start reading them a story.

In the middle of the story, they type, “Hey, _______?”

“Yeah?”

“Do you like Sans?”

You freeze. “Um…well, sure, sweetie. He’s my friend.”

“No.” They squint at you. “Like like.” 

You laugh, high and nervous. “Why do you ask?”

“You look at him like my parents look at each other. I think it would be nice.”

“Well…I’ll keep that in mind.”

“Okay.” They yawn. “Please continue with the story. And do more voices, please.”

You acquiesce, but the conversation stays on your mind.

When Frisk is sleeping as well, you traipse downstairs to sit next to Sans. For a while, you just look at him. He looks so much more peaceful when he’s sleeping.

Why does everyone think you like Sans? You don’t, he’s your best friend, and everybody sort of wants to kiss their best friends every once in a while, right—

He shifts in his sleep and makes a little noise, and your heart pangs again, then fills with dread. No, people don’t want to kiss their best friends. And your heart doesn’t flutter for any of your other friends, either. Not like it does for Sans.

Crap.

You do like Sans, don’t you.

_Crap._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ho ho ho...


	27. Day 5: Period 3

_________ 12:23 AM  
alphys u awake

_________ 12:23 AM  
alphys

_________ 12:25 AM  
aalllppphhyyyyysssss

ALPHYS 12:34 AM  
now I am. what’s up?

_________ 12:34 AM  
thank goodness

_________ 12:35 AM  
something terrible has happened

ALPHYS 12:35 AM  
what?!

_________ 12:35 AM  
if. u say i told u so i will slap you

ALPHYS 12:36 AM  
????????

_________ 12:38 AM  
…ok so i might. have. the teeniest tiniest gigantic crush on sans

ALPHYS 12:39 AM  
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

_________ 12:39 AM  
alphys

ALPHYS 12:40 AM  
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

_________ 12:41 AM  
ALPHYS THIS IS NOT A GOOD THING HOW DO I MAKE IT STOP

ALPHYS 12:41 AM  
why is it a bad thing?

_________ 12:42 AM  
because? theres no way he likes me back???

ALPHYS 12:42 AM  
uhhhhh of course he does

_________ 12:42 AM  
no he doesnt and im not gonna argue about this. i know him, ok? and so do you he gets super awkward around his crushes and he is perfectly comfortable with me

ALPHYS 12:43 AM  
I am like 98% certain that you are too close to this situation to make an accurate judgment on that. you two have always been awkward lol?

_________ 12:45 AM  
wow thx

ALPHYS 12:45 AM  
no problem dear ;P so what are you going to do about it?

_________ 12: 46 AM  
um. nothing???

ALPHYS 12:46 AM  
whaaaaattttt

_________ 12:46 AM  
im just going to languish alone and hope it goes away

ALPHYS 12:47 AM  
good luck with that lol

_________ 12:47 AM  
ur the worst ;A; (jk i love u)

ALPHYS 12:49 AM  
but not as much as u love SANSSSSSSS

_________ 12:49 AM  
SHUT UP

By lunchtime that day, Alphys has told Undyne, who told Asgore, who told Toriel. They all smile placidly at you until you’re a blushing mess and yell at them to stop. Sans is confused. You would like to keep it that way.

“So, Sans, how was babysitting last night?” asks Toriel, breaking the silence.

“it was fine. the kids were pretty cute. one of them is kind of obsessed with me.”

“I know somebody else who is obsessed with you,” murmurs Undyne. Alphys elbows her in the side.

“What did you and ________ do after the kids went to sleep?” Alphys asks, with a wink that luckily looks more like an eye twitch.

“uh, i dunno. i was asleep too until they woke me up.”

“I wonder what happened while you were sleeping,” Toriel muses aloud. “Seems like the perfect time of night for thoughtful reflection, you know? Like the time of night that you might realize things you hadn’t realized before.”

“I realized that I have terrible friends,” you say through gritted teeth.

Asgore claps his hand together. “Well, no more talk of that. Sans, what are you doing after school today?”

He considers, then shrugs. “i dunno. ________, you want to do anything?”

“Oh, I can think of some _one_ they want to do,” giggles Undyne, and you shoot her a murderous glare.

“Yeah, actually, I wanted to study for the test coming up,” you say once you’ve composed yourself. “I was wondering if—“

“yeah, yeah, i’ll help. your house or mine?”

“Yours,” you decide, trying to ignore the various grins and thumbs-up you’re getting from around the table. “We went to mine yesterday, even if it was only for a bit.”

“all right. Papyrus will be excited, he’s been wanting to perform his monologue for you or something.”

“Oh, good! I’ve been wondering what the play is even about.”

“no idea. it’s a Mettaton original. but Papyrus has said it’s a love story.”

“Huh. Okay.”

Lunch finishes more or less uneventfully after that, if you don’t count your friends’ continued jabbing as ‘eventful’. The rest of the Friday continues much the same way, until you pick up Papyrus.

Papyrus is nearly vibrating with excitement when he reaches the car.

“What’s got you so hyper?” you ask once Papyrus is buckled in safely and you’re maneuvering out of the parking lot.

He can barely eke out a coherent sentence. “UNDYNE! SHE TOLD ME! THE THING!”

You groan. Sans asks, “what thing?”

“THIS IS PERFECT! IT’S JUST LIKE THE STORIES! BROTHER, ________— “

You speak up loudly. “Whoa, sure is a nice day today, huh? What a great Friday to just relax and not talk about things that Undyne has said, ever.”

Sans squints at you suspiciously, but lets it go.

After a round of studying and dinner, Papyrus sits you, Sans, and Gaster down in the living room for his performance. He clears his throat, then begins. 

“PEPITO, I KNOW THAT WHEN WE BEGAN, WE WERE BUT FAKE DATEFRIENDS. BUT I HAVE FALLEN IN DEEP, ROMANTIC LOVE WITH YOU. PLEASE RUN AWAY WITH ME SO THAT WE CAN KISS—“

You blanch and beckon Papyrus over, hissing in the area that his ear would be if he had one, “What is this?”

“MY MONOLOGUE!”

“I get that, but what’s with the whole fake datefriends thing?”

“I TOLD METTATON ABOUT YOU AND SANS’ STORY, AND HE MADE IT INTO A MUSICAL.”

You massage your temples. “Are you being serious right now?”

“VERY!”

Papyrus has been whispering, but he whispers very loudly, so Sans can hear perfectly well. “you did what?”

“SANS, I AM HAVING A PRIVATE CONVERSATION WITH ________. PLEASE DO NOT EAVESDROP. IT IS VERY RUDE.”

“your friend made a musical about your brother and i’m the rude one?!”

“YES. AS I WAS SAYING—“

“Dad, do something!” 

Gaster has been hiding his smile behind his hand. “I don’t really know what you want me to do, Sans.”

“tell him that it’s wrong to make musicals about people’s lives!”

“I’m pretty sure this is a fictional musical about Pepito and his one true love—Papyrus, what’s your character’s name?”

“ALEXANDER THE GREAT.”

“Alexander the Great, of course. Anyway, I don’t really see a problem here.”

“the problem is—agh! whatever. i’m going up to my room. ________, come on.”

You bite your lip, then follow Sans, who is stomping his way up to his room.

Once inside, he throws himself on his bed.

“You okay?”

“no.”

You sit down beside him and rub your hand lightly over his back. “It’s just some silly kid’s play, Sans. It’s no big deal.”

“i just don’t get it.”

“Get what?”

“why people always think we’re in love!”

You fall silent, and your hand ceases its motion. 

“i mean, you heard him. deep, romantic love? why does that have to be the ending to our story?”

Your heart cracks a little bit. “Would it be so terrible?”

“what?”

“Being in love with me.” You try to keep your tone light, but you don’t know how successful you are.

He sits up. “oh. um, _______—you know I don’t mean it like that—“

“Don’t you?” You shake your head and stand up. “Never mind.”

“uh, ________?”

“I’m going home. I’m kind of tired. Sorry.”

“_________? what’s wrong—“

“Like I said. Tired.” You flash a very fake-looking smile at him. “Don’t worry about it.”

“but—“

“I said don’t worry about it.” You start to walk out the door, calling over your shoulder, “Have a good weekend.”

The door closes, and he tries to process what just happened. His SOUL feels heavy.

Had he just messed up somehow?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter ended up very different than the outline i had written for these six chapters lol. o well
> 
> also, would people be interested in a sequel to this story following the gang in college? lmk


	28. Day 5: Period 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cw for a fight with a parent

After about five minutes, he goes downstairs, still lost in thought.

“Sans? _______ just left, they seemed like they were in a hurry—“

“yeah, i know.” Sans frowns and sits down at a seat at the dinner table. “i think i said something.”

“Hm. Do you want to talk about it?”

“not really.”

“All right. Then do you want to talk about these?”

In Gaster’s hands are the two acceptance letters he had shoved in his pockets.

“where did you—“

“I was doing laundry, since you can’t be bothered to do it yourself. Can you explain to me why you didn’t tell me about this?”

Sans squirms uncomfortably. “forgot?”

“Really? That’s an important thing to forget. Sans, the response deadline for that science college is pretty soon.”

“yes, i know.”

“And? Aren’t you going to accept?”

“i…don’t really want to.”

Gaster’s voice is dangerous. “What?”

“Dad, i want to go to the other one.”

“Why is that?”

“it’s closer, and it has a good physics program, and—“

“And the other one’s program is even better.”

“yeah, but i have friends who are going to this one—“

“Like _______?”

Sans crosses his arms defensively. “yeah, like ________.”

“So you’re going to let yourself be dragged down by them?”

“what the crap? they’re not dragging me down, i just—“

“You can make new friends, better friends—“

“but i like the friends i have now!”

“You have to be willing to change! You’re nearly an adult, Sans! You need to make responsible decisions!”

“i don’t see what’s so irresponsible about—“

“This is your future! Don’t you even care—“

“but the program at the science school will be harder, and—“

“You have to work hard to attain your dreams!”

“if you would just listen!—“

“Sans, you are better than this!”

“NO, I’M NOT!” Sans screams, and he’s distantly horrified to notice that he’s crying. “I’M NOT BETTER THAN THIS! THIS IS WHO I AM. I’M A LAZY, GOOD-FOR-NOTHING, WORTHLESS PIECE OF CRAP AND I ALWAYS WILL BE.” He takes a deep shuddering breath and tries to calm down. “and that won’t change even if i go to that college. look, i know i’m a disappointment, all right? i know i’m supposed to be your science prodigy son and make up for the fact that you never did anything with your life, or something. but instead you got me, and you’re just going to have to deal with that.”

“Sans—“ Gaster is frowning, but Sans can’t tell what he’s feeling. Anger? Sadness? Whatever, it doesn’t matter.

“i’m going to check on Papyrus, and then i’m going to go back up to my room.”

“Sans.”

Sans starts to move towards the stairway, but he’s stopped by a surprisingly gentle hand on his arm.

“Sans. You’re not a disappointment, all right? Please believe me when I say that. I don’t understand some of the choices you’re making, but nothing you do can stop me from being proud of you. I…realize I haven’t been doing the best job of showing that. I’m sorry.”

“do…” Sans coughs. “do you mean that?”

“Of course. Look. You can go to whichever college you want. It’s your decision. I shouldn’t be trying to make it for you.”

“…thanks. i’ll, uh. think about it.”

“All right. Thank you. And Sans?”

“yeah?”

“I…love you, okay?”

Sans freezes, his foot hovering above the first step. 

“You don’t have to say anything, I just want you to know that.”

“i…love you too,” Sans says in a quiet voice, then runs up the stairs and back to his room. 

When the door is shut, he wipes his tears with the back of his hand and slides down against the door. He has no idea how to feel right now. Normally, if he was feeling like this, he would just text you. But he’s guessing that’s not an option right now.

So he goes for the next best thing.

snas  
tori

Toriel (:  
yes? is _______ with you?

snas  
they. left.

Toriel (:  
oh, really?

snas  
i think i said something wrong. something bad.

Toriel (:  
what did you say?

snas  
i just asked why people always thought we were in love and they said like  
“would it be so bad if we were” or something  
and then they just left

Toriel (:  
…  
how did you respond?

snas  
they didn’t even let me, they just left! they said they were tired and that nothing was wrong

Toriel (:  
oh, Sans.  
You need to apologize.

snas  
but i don’t even know what i’m supposed to be apologizing for!

Toriel (:  
I can’t tell you that.  
You need to work it out on your own.  
But make sure that _______ knows how important they are to you.

snas  
why?

Toriel (:  
just trust me. as your friend, okay?  
I know what I’m talking about. (:

snas  
fine, miss cryptic

He pulls out his phone and texts you.

“hey, _______? whatever i said, i’m sorry. i didn’t mean to”

You respond.

“I know, Sans. It’s fine.”

He draws back. You never use proper punctuation and grammar unless you’re really sad, really anxious, or…really mad.

“crap i must have really messed up. what did i do seriously”

“Nothing. I’m just being silly.”

“no, you’re not, i’m just…” He hesitates, then decides to follow Toriel’s advice. “idk. but you know you’re really important to me, right?”

You read the text, but don’t say anything.

“you’re my best friend”

You read the text. You still don’t say anything.

Taking a swing in the dark, he continues, “and like. anybody would be lucky to have you”

You read the text.

Finally, you say “Anybody, huh? Hah. Goodnight, Sans.”

You’re still mad, and he doesn’t know why. Groaning, he lays down on his bed and goes over everything again.

“Would it be so terrible being in love with me?” you had said. Maybe he made you feel undesirable? But, he was being honest when he said anybody would be lucky to have you. You were great. The best, really. 

Unbidden, his mind conjures up images of you walking up to the lunch table with a new datefriend on your arm. Of you laughing at their jokes, of you feeding them your lunch, of you spending all your time with them. Of you loving them.

He suddenly feels intensely nauseous.

Weird.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sans must have fun in his little world being completely oblivious to everything lol
> 
> and i think i'll be doing that sequel! the response was pretty overwhelmingly positive so


	29. Day 5: Period 5

The following week is very awkward. You still talk with him, but you more or less only speak when spoken to, and you decline every time he asks if you want to come over. Whenever he looks over at you and you think he’s not looking, you have this lost, closed-off expression on your face. Then, inevitably, you catch him and smile. But it’s not the same as your usual smile. It’s pretty obvious you’re forcing it. 

Then comes Friday. He wants to ask you to partner with him in hopes that maybe things will be different somehow—you had partnered with Alphys on both Monday and Wednesday, after all—but Gaster has other ideas.

“I’ve noticed you tend to partner with the same people,” he announces. “Today I’ll be assigning your partners. It will be somebody you’ve never worked with before.”

He goes through the entire class roster—you’re with some quiet girl named Judith, and Alphys is with a Lesser Dog, who is overenthusiastic but overall not too bad—until he gets to Sans, the last pair on the list.

“And…Sans, you’re with Aaron.”

If Sans had proper human eyes, they probably would have bugged out right then. As it stands, he just marches up to his dad and hisses, “Aaron? seriously? you know what he did to me!”

His dad shrugs with a smile and says, “I’m not allowed to give you special treatment, remember? This was a random assignment.”

“but—“

“No buts. Sit down, please.”

Sans does as he is told, sitting as far away from Aaron at their assigned table as possible.

“Why hello there ;)”

“please just shut up. we don’t need to talk to each other to do this.”

“Jeez okay ;(“

Sans and Aaron work through the assignment silently. Aaron is actually a surprisingly conscientious partner, as long as he doesn’t talk. They end up finishing with about ten minutes left on the clock.

“Haha so what now? ;)”

“now we wait for class to be over and walk out of this hell, hopefully unscathed.”

“Look, I know we haven’t gotten along so well in the past. But you don’t need to treat me like that ;(“

“fine.”

“So…you’re friends with _______, right?”

Sans scowls. He doesn’t want to make polite conversation, or any kind of conversation, with Aaron of all people. But, clenching his fists, he responds cordially, “yeah.”

“Are they single?”

“…why?”

“Because I would totally hop on that ;)”

Sans sees blue. “excuse me?”

“Seriously, when they threatened me it was kinda hot ;) I’ve been thinking I might ask them out, see where things go. Who knows? I might even get luck—“

Sans hears his nonexistent blood rushing in his nonexistent ears, and next thing he knows, he’s punching Aaron directly in the muzzle.

“OW! WHAT THE CRAP, DUDE ;( —“

“Sans! What is the meaning of this—“ Gaster comes rushing over. 

“i’m sorry, but he—!” Sans is absolutely fuming. “he said—!”

“It doesn’t matter what he said, this is completely inappropriate! I’ll deal with you later. Aaron, please head to the nurse’s office.”

The class is abuzz with conversation, and Gaster struggles to quiet everyone down. “Everyone, back to your seats! Please just—“

But then the bell rings, and everybody crowds out of the door. Sans tries to escape with the rest of them, but he is stopped by Gaster, whose face is filled with quiet fury. “Sans. Explain. Now.”

He sees you hanging behind, looking worried. It’s more emotion than he’s seen on your face all week. He wants to go over to you, tell you everything is all right, tell you—

“I said explain!”

“he insulted _______,” Sans mumbles. “He insinuated something disgusting—“

“Wait, what?” You’re next to him now, and you’re frowning. “This is because of me?”

“he said he wanted to go out with you because he thought you might put out! i had to set him straight—“

“Sans, I can take care of myself! Who cares what Aaron thinks? You didn’t need to punch him. That was completely out of line.”

“but—but you—“

“Sans, I’m not yours!” You sound pissed. “You don’t get to—to defend my honor like some kind of white knight. It’s not your place. It’s not like you’re my datefriend or anything!” Then you storm off, leaving him staring at you, jaw agape.

“but…but i want you to be,” he says helplessly, only realizing that it’s true when he says it out loud.

How could he be so dense? He’s loved you all this time, hasn’t he, and—and you probably like him too, he thinks with a rush of joy. That’s why you got so sad when he got angry about people thinking you were in love. “Would it really be so terrible being in love with me?”

No. No, it wouldn’t. It would be wonderful, and terrifying, and beautiful, and—and he had to tell you, he had to—

He starts to run out the door.

He is stopped again by Gaster. “Where do you think you’re going?”

“i have to—“

“What you have to do is sit here for the next two hours and think about what you’ve done. Detention, Sans.”

“but—“

“No buts. And give me your phone. I don’t want you texting anyone. You may do your homework if you wish.”

The next two hours are agony. He finishes his homework by the first hour. By the one hour thirty minute mark, he’s rechecked all of his work and rewritten everything. By the two hour mark, he feels like he may explode.

Gaster looks up from his desk and says calmly, “You may go. Here’s your phone.”

He takes his phone and immediately tries to call you as he runs out the door.

You don’t pick up.

He tries again. You don’t pick up. 

He texts you. You don’t read his messages.

Finally, he calls Alphys. “Alphys! have you heard from _______?”

“Whoa, what’s going on?”

“please, just tell me where they are. i need to tell them something.”

“They’re at the airport leaving for their hometown, but—“

He hangs up before Alphys can finish her sentence. The airport! He had pissed you off so much you were leaving for home? What about school, what about your mom? What about him?

Crap.

He runs back inside and, panting hard, tells Gaster, “you need to drive me to the airport.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we're ALMOST THERE GUYS--
> 
> (also to the person who guessed that Sans would get jealous and it would be Aaron's fault a few chapters back, who are you and how did you read my outline for these chapters lol...)


	30. Last Period

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i highly recommend you youtube the william tell overture for the first part of the chapter if you don't already know which piece i'm talking about lol

“I beg your pardon?”

“i said, you need to drive me to the airport. right now. please.”

“Sans, what—“

“_______ is gone and they’re at the airport and they’re leaving for home and i need to tell them i love them before they’re gone forever and—“

“Whoa, whoa. Calm down there. I can drive you to the airport, but—“

“then what are we waiting for?! let’s go!”

“But,” Gaster continues patiently, “We need to pick up Papyrus first.”

Sans can’t stop his foot from tapping impatiently on the floor of the front seat as Gaster hums along to classical music on their way to Papyrus’ school.

“Sans, please calm down.”

“i can’t!” He feels like he might cry from frustration. “the love of my life is going to leave without ever knowing how i feel!”

“All right, all right.”

Papyrus gets in the car, and they zoom off towards the direction of the freeway, except—

“Dad, you’re so slow!”

“I’m going the speed limit!”

“________ SAYS THE SPEED LIMIT IS JUST A GUIDELINE,” offers Papyrus sagely.

“WHAT?!” screams Gaster. “And you’ve been driving home with them for how long—“

After that little argument, Sans is slumped over in his seat, Gaster now conducting to the beat of the William Tell Overture. 

“Dad, seriously?”

“What? I like this song.”

The rickety minivan finally slides with a final sputter into the drop-offs lane of the terminal at the airport. Sans jumps out of the car before it’s even finished moving, already running into the airport building and scanning the departures screen for your hometown.

There. It’s scheduled to leave in about forty-five minutes. He still has time.

First, he tries to get through security. 

“Ticket?”

“no, i don’t have a ticket, but—“

“No ticket, no admission. Sorry, bud.”

“but i need to tell someone i love them!”

“Sorry. I can’t do that. Send them a text or something.”

He calls you one last time, and—oh, blessed day—you finally pick up.

“Sans, what on earth—“

“i’m at the airport!”

“What?! How did you even know—“

“Alphys. look, i need to talk to you. i need to tell you something. it’s really important!”

“Huh? I’m already at my gate—“

“please come back!”

“I’m not going back through security, even for you!” you snap. “Look, I have a headache, and—“

“please,” he says desperately.

There’s a long silence.

“Fine. I’ll meet you over the gate. But if you’re wasting my time, I swear—“

“i’m not, promise!”

“All right. See you in, like, ten minutes.”

You hang up, and he waits.

Finally, you show up, a small suitcase rolling behind you and a frown on your face. “Sans—“

“_______, i love you,” Sans says breathlessly.

You just stare at him.

“What?”

“i said—“ Starting to feel uncertain, he asks, “i love you?”

“…Okay.”

“okay?!”

“I don’t know what Alphys told you, but I really don’t appreciate you joking with me. I have a flight to catch, so—“

“no, you can’t go! i really do love you. i just realized. i’m so sorry.”

“Wait, you’re serious?”

“yes.”

“Like, legitimately?”

“yes like legitimately.”

You start smiling, and it’s your real smile, and it’s so beautiful, and—

“Wait. Why couldn’t you wait to tell me that, though?”

“huh? because you’re leaving for your hometown.”

“Yeah, for the weekend. My dad made me promise before I left that I’d come visit.”

“…visit?”

“Yeah? Why would I leave just before school ends, you dork?”

“well, i mean. it didn’t make much sense, admittedly—“

“And—“ You reach across the fence to hold his hands, still smiling. “Why would I ever leave you?”

“you mean—“

“Yeah. I love you too. But you’re still a dork.”

“oh.” He starts to feel very foolish. “um, yeah. i probably am.”

“Definitely,” you correct.

The security guard sighs next to you. “This is all very sweet, but—“

“Oh, yeah! Sorry!” You drop his hands. “I do honestly need to go. The plane will start boarding soon, and I don’t want to sit near the back if I don’t have to.”

“but you’re coming back?”

“I’m coming back.”

“okay.” He can’t stop smiling either. “well, then…see you.”

“See you.”

After you’ve passed from his sight, his phone buzzes.

“and i can still text you too”

Then again.

“dork”

\----------------

He scans for you across the football field, starting to get worried when he can’t see you. You had promised to meet up at this spot—

“Guess who,” you murmur up against him, and he whirls around to see you laughing. 

“That was priceless, oh my gosh.”

He shuts you up by pressing his teeth up against your lips. You wrap your arms around his neck, and—

“You two are still so disgusting,” gripes Undyne as she approaches. “It’s been like a month and a half since you two got together. Aren’t you tired of it yet?”

“Never,” you grin at her. 

Alphys appears from behind Undyne. “Congratulations on your graduation, guys!” 

“Thanks. Have you seen Toriel and Asgore?”

Alphys sighs and points. They’re making out a few feet away.

“oh. gross.”

“Now you know how we feel!” says Undyne, aggravated.

“Oh, come on. Like you and Alphys aren’t just as bad.”

Alphys blushes. “Not in public,” she protests.

“you’re admitting you’re just as bad in private?”

“Kinky,” you whisper to Sans. The huff of your laughter is warm against his skull.

You are very warm in general, he’s discovered. Your way of talking is warm. Your hugs are warm. Your laughter, smile, eyes, kisses—

“Sans is blushing,” notes Alphys smugly. 

“I wonder what he’s thinking?” muses Undyne, just as smugly.

“Probably about his cute datefriend,” says Toriel as she approaches your group. “If I had that cute of a datefriend, I would be blushing too.”

“Hey,” says Asgore mildly.

She pats him on the bicep. “You are very handsome, dear. But you are not cute.”

He shrugs. “I’ll take it.”

Sans puts an arm around your waist, and you smile at him.

Your mom, stepdad, dad, and Gaster come walking up together. “We sat together in the stands,” Gaster explains. “________, your mother is delightful.”

The kids are right behind with their mom. “You made me sit out in the sun for this?” complains Chara. “I was so bored.”

“Hush,” types Frisk sternly. “This was lovely.”

“I like your special hats,” offers Asriel. 

“So, Sans, when are you planning on getting an apartment out near your new school?” asks your mom. 

“not until the late summer.”

“________, you?” asks Gaster.

“Same. We’re going to try to coordinate to get ones as close to each other as possible so that we can have movie nights.”

“i voted for same complex, but _______ wants to be independent or some crap like that,” grumbles Sans. “i don’t get why they can’t be independent in the same complex as me.”

“We’ve been over this,” you say chidingly. 

“You two are very sweet,” says your mom. “Like an old married couple already.”

You bump up against your mom embarrassedly. “Mom, you don’t need to drop the m-word.”

“What? I’m just saying.”

As the conversation continues all around you, Sans holds you tighter against him and lays his head on your shoulder. You stroke the hand that’s at your waist, and he smiles soft and slow, and everything is just pretty good.

You’re not so worried about your future anymore. You think you and Sans will do just fine. And even if you don’t—you’ll be together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks everybody for sticking with me this long! i really appreciate everyone who commented, gave kudos, or just read. you're all sweethearts and i love you. also, be on the lookout for the sequel! i need to work out...like, a plot and crap lol...so it might not be immediately, but it should be p soon. i'll also post the beginning of my teacher au at some point, either after the sequel is done or sometime while i'm writing it.
> 
> as always, please feel free to drop by my tumblr at anuninterestingperson! i love to hear from you guys. i also track all of the tags for my stories semi-religiously lol so
> 
> thanks again, and best wishes! <3

**Author's Note:**

> so, here we are at my next fic! this is in a completely new 'verse, though _______ is more or less the same character as the ________ from undertale.igf. i decided i wanted to do a teacher AU, but my friends wanted a school AU first, so that's what i'm doing lol. anyway i'm looking forward to this!


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